Insomniac

Healing

 I woke up next day and my head ached so bad and still I had wet tears in my eyes, I felt terribly tired and overloaded since sleeping a couple hours and bitter crying in a fifteen year old being is just overloading and hard to keep, I thought about lighting my phone...but sincerely I did not wanted to have a morning fight nor to fight so early on the morning nor to read cruel or harsh messages, but most of all I feared Chris would have deceided to break me, that was my greatest fear, that which made me tremble and want to die and cry bitterly than ever, but I deceided to don't think about it, in fact I didn't even checked the freaking phone, I left it off and went away to eat breakfast, but I assured to clean my face since Mother didn't had to know I had being crying and all about Chris' actitude, she did had to get worried for my personal and emotional stuff, so I kept it to myself and set a good face to face the sunshine of my window and mother down stares, I went and we silently but happily ate cereal for breakfast, she was texting which was weid since she usually did never at table, so she finally said,

 "My my! Chris is an angel! He is insisting in coming today to see you! But  Do you want?"

 After thinking it for a second I said, "No, thanks, I...have homework"

 She just saw me and kept texting with him, I just tried to keep faking happiness, which was working , since she didn't noticed how broken I was, so I went to take a bath just to fix up to dress nicely for an afternoon at home but looking well, then I went to my room, alone, and started to write and  listen to my good songs, Owl City to be exact, I was just so in love with "Up All Night" and "Beautiful Times" since this last was about a hard life and somebody fighting to survive until the dawn arrives and the tight ceases  its fury, really encouraging...it became my hymn. I wore my pale jeans and a gray bluse along with loose hair and just a tip of lip gloss, and there I laid on my bed, until....

  I was falling asleep and thinking of Chris, then I closed my eyes and felt a soft cold and loving hand over my face, and some marblelike lips on my forehead, I opened my eyes and his eyes met on mine, and on a whisper he warmly and intensely said, "I love to see you sleeping my beautiful girl" It was Chris! Right there infront of me !It took me some minutes to realize it wasn't a dream but when I did I stood still and away since still I was feeling low about him

 "Dear... please, I know I mistreated you and I am such an idiot about that but please sorry, just please please forgive me I..."- he was intensely saying

" I love you? Is this one real, or temporary? You were so cruel, and tough and before that unreasonable cold, I can no longer believe in your promises...maybe neither is your love real,"- I said sadly and firmly with tears in the eyes and a sobbing throat

 "No, please don't question my love, it's pure and sincere and no one on this earth has loved the way  I love You, you're my everything but lastily athletics is your everything and I miss you and then you said that of Caleb and I got jealous since I want you just for me and to me, understand..just please! I'm desesperate I can't see you everyday and this dude surely does and you enjoy it, I was cold cause I was angry and feeling low, my pride held me even from coming but finally my will and love were insense and I realized my need of you, you're that which somehow destroys my pride...I simply love you and please forgive me for being and idiot"- he sadly said as tears rolled out of his beautiful eyes and the sun from the golden afternoon through the window poured over his beautiful brown hair, his crying was honest and heartbreaking then he just stared at me.

  Then he did not waited for my answer since I was standing on the opposite side of the room and was crying, he hurried to me and hugged me in a fantastic way, his strong arms and chest surrounded my simple human being and his face got buried in my neck as he tried not to sob and so I did, as I hugged him I could feel his strong thick back, his might was absolute and his crying was in some way my fault so I deceided to apologize him and try to make him feel better, I played with his hair and kissed his hair and head, then he carried me up and stared at me with deep love on his eyes beaming at me, he gently put me down and touched his lips on mine, his gently kiss warmed my being and brought me to life, I just loved him, the whole palid,  warm and tender boy , then I said