The Bully (Frerard)(Completed)

Chapter 15: Just Listen To Me!

Frank's POV:

Once we got to the street where my and Gerard's houses were, I sighed. It wasn't an exaggerated sigh that said, 'Give me attention!' It was just a simple sigh, it was hinted with sadness and frustration.

We didn't talk at all while we walked, just silence.

Once we reached the middle of the length of the street, where our houses were located, I turned and headed to mine.

I'm stopped by a hand grabbing onto mine, Gerard's, of course, "Please... Come to mine," he asks in the form of a statement.

"No," is my only response before attempting to rip my hand free. He only tightened his grip after that.

"Please, Frank, I want to talk!" He exclaims, tears were pricking at his eyes, and I felt sad, well sadder, because he was sad. I know, it's all mushy, but I feel like what Gerard feels, I feel. Eww, I sound like a 12 year old with her first crush. Gosh, Frank, your gay is showing.

I sigh, exasperated, I just wanted this day to end. First I get told by boyfriend, who supposedly likes me so fucking much, that he doesn't want to be seen with me in public. Then I go and shred up my arms. I was on a good month without self harm. That's all gone now. And now, I'm getting begged to go and talk about the one thing that is making me feel like complete and utter shit.

"I'll give you 30 minutes," is my quiet response.

He smiles slightly and then we head over to his house.

When we get in, his mom greets us, "Hello, Frank, Gerard. How was school?"

"Fine," I grumble.

We head down to Gerard's room, I knew this was going to get heated. I was raging as it is and this talk was only going to make it worse.

"I'm sorry, Frank. I just.. I- I-"

"Didn't want to risk your perfect reputation as a tough jock by coming out of the closet and walking into school holding hands with the school faggot," I finish for him.

"No! That's not it, Fra-"

"Yes, it is! I see what you're thinking. You don't want to be like me. A faggot. A sinner. A worthless piece of shit. A... A..." I couldn't finish my sentence, I burst into tears, I was just coming out with all of the truth and, honestly, it hurt me worse saying it out loud than it did just thinking it in the school bathroom.

"No, please, Frank! Listen to me! I only said that because-"

"You have a reputation to keep ahold of. You're the tough jock who doesn't take shit from anyone and beats up anyone who doesn't fit to your standards. I know how it works, Gerard!" I was now sobbing hysterically, my throat was becoming raw from the yelling even though it hasn't been that long.

Gerard takes two long strides over to me and tries to comfort me, "Frank," he whispers.

"No. Stop it, Gerard. I don't need anymore of your lies," I muster out with a harsh tone set in.

"I'm not lying, if you'd just let me explain! I could tell you-"

"All about... How... How you don't love me! How you... You love one of those sluts.. With.. With the short skirts.. An-And the tight shir-shirts! I know, G... Ger.... Gerard!" I scream out at him, I've had enough. I know, I'm the one making the conversation this way but I can't help it. It's what I think and I always tell him what I'm thinking.

I look up at him, his face was red with anger. I saw the fury in his eyes, they were squinted in a rueful glare and then he acts on the anger. He tackles me to the floor, taking the breath out of me.

He has my hands pinned down and is straddling my hips, he starts screaming, "Shut up, Frank! You don't know what I'm fucking thinking! Just shut up and let me talk! I wanted to tell you that I wasn't ready," his voice has calmed down to indoor level, "to be seen because I was scared, okay? I never realized what it actually felt like to be bullied, and the thought of getting beaten by Greyson and the other scared the shit out of me! I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything! Beating you up, making you feel worthless, lying, being a bad boyfriend! All of it! I'm so sorry, you don't deserve it! You're worth much more than how I've treated you. You mean so much to me and... I hate being who I am. I.. I do love you, Frank. I'm not lying and you know it," he finishes off, and then gets off of me.

I stay on the floor, I'm still crying, only now I'm shaking and crying harder. How could I have been so blind? I had the ability to read Gerard so easily and I let it go to waste by accusing him of.... Everything. I cut myself because of my pathetically incorrect accusations.

"I'm so sorry," I mumble, it was half to me and half to Gerard.

"For what?" He asks.

"Everything, the accusations, the screaming, the... Everything."

I look down at my jacket covered arms, a look of guilt coats my face and not only does Gerard notice, but he catches on.

"You...." He trails off, we both knew what he was about to say.

'Cut.'

C.U.T.

I nod regretfully and let the tears of shame start falling from my eyes.

Gerard closes the space between us and pulls me into a hug, "It was my fault," he states.

I nod, I'm not going to lie.

He lets me go and looks at my trembling arms, "Can I see?"

I nod again and slowly unzip my jacket and pull my arms from the sleeves.

To say Gerard is horrified is an understatement. He looks absolutely petrified, mortified, and scared. My arms were covered in dry blood that leaked out after I washed them, the cuts were jagged and stretched out. He gasps and covers his mouth with his hand. It was a late reaction, but only because he was in shock.

"Your arms.."

*~*~*~*~*

This chapter is mehish.

xoxoCrashFire