Blackmoon's Mate

Saying Goodbye

Tyler

Its been a few days since Athena killed her self. I have been feeling like shit since we found her body in the tub. There was absolutely nothing we could have done; the cocaine, silver and wolfsbane had done its damage. I feel as if I have failed as an Alpha, I should've felt her wolf calling out to me in pain. Aurora is trying to be here for me but I don't really want her around me. Athena's parents came to get her body and I contacted her "mate" Adam and told him the moment I read the note. It was terrible hearing him howl out in pain from the news but I couldn't bring myself to feel sorry for him. He told me he rejected her over the phone before I could tell him what she had did. His wife hung up the phone after cursing me out for hurting her husband. Thinking of Athena hurts, this woman was my first love. This is the woman who I grew up with, opened up to and made love to. Aurora has been allowing me to mourn Athena by myself but I haven't cried. I haven't been able to believe that she's really gone. Even as I held her weeping mother as her body was lowered into the ground I couldn't fathom a world without Athena. Aurora knows my thoughts hell she reads my mind when I don't talk to her. Talking about my now dead first love hurts me to the core. Being her Alpha plus her ex lover makes the pain almost unbearable. Aurora being the Luna feels it as well just not the way I do.

She doesn't quite understand how I feel considering I'm her first everything. I can't be upset about her naivety either because she was sheltered. Sometimes I think of what it would be like if the world was different and Athena was my mate. I have been staying in a cottage in the woods to get alone time because I have been thinking if she was my mate. Our children would be strong and beautiful. I hope they would have her eyes and hair. I've always loved her hair. It was thick and bouncy. To numb my mind a little I go get me something strong to drink. Lately I've been drinking and sleeping the pain away; although she wasn't my mate my wolf mourns her death. After drinking a whole bottle I feel myself slipping into a somewhat peaceful sleep.

Aurora

The past week has been bullshit. My mates has been mourning his freshly dead ex girlfriend which I completely understand but this man wont stop. Stop what you may ask, let me tell you what he wont stop. He keeps thinking of her as his mate, he drinks himself into oblivion and hasn't been home since her funeral. His actions and thoughts are causing my wolf and I pain. Imagine the man you have given all of yourself to loses his shit because of the death of his ex girlfriend and now ignores you to drink and think of her as his other half instead of you. Half the time I want to slap the everlasting shit out of him. I am hurting over the loss of her and although I didn't have the relationship he had with her I feel as if he's going overboard. Then again I haven't experienced this pain firsthand, as I only feel his pain as he is feeling it. As Luna I have been running the pack and doing all the pack work while he is moping. I am not happy whatsoever. Tired of sitting in his office doing work while he thinks of how beautiful their pups could have been I storm through the woods and into the cottage. What I saw broke my heart and made me angry at the same time. Tyler was passed out on the couch with an empty bottle of expensive alcohol. The bags under his eyes are now a dark purple and he smelled to high heaven. I went to the bathroom filled a bucket of water and dumped it on him. He spluttered to life like dead engine and he was furious.

"What the fuck was that for who the fu--Aurora. What are you doing here?"

"I am here to get my mate up. Unless you plan on rejecting me and joining her wherever she is I suggest you get up, take a shower and get your shit together," by the end of this we were both fuming which is the first time I've gotten a spark of emotion from him since her death. He calmed down and followed me out of the cottage back to the house we shared together. Along the way pack members watched us walk by, it looked as if I were a teacher and he was the bratty toddler who needed to be put in his place. When we got to the house he immediately went to shower and I went to his office to complete the work I had started before I left to give him a reality check. As I was finishing the work he knocked on the door and walked in before I could tell him to leave me alone.

"Aurora I-- Fuck I don't even know what to say. No words can express how I'm feeling. MY first love killed herself. She walked away from her mate for me you know? She came back expecting us to be together and instead found you and I. Even though we weren't talking at the time I think she already knew she had lost me to you. My emotions are mixed, my mind is fucked and I don't know what to do. Please try to understand me," he looked at me and I saw how vulnerable he is. I took his hands and lead him to our room. I turned on the tv and we watched Me Before You. At the end I heard a sob and then Tyler cried into my chest for Athena and I cried for them both.

hola guys!!! first chapter written on my new laptop. hope you enjoyed this chapter and sad to say this is the end. one more chapter left in this book *insert sad face* love you guys!! bye!