Only Saving Grace I Ever Had (Kellic)

Chapter Twenty Nine

*Flashback*
I was wrong when I assumed Craig would stay away for good.

Things have only gotten so much worse. Josh and I don't talk anymore, I can't bring myself to talk to my parents.

They love me and keep trying to get in contact, but I still feel that they are disappointed in me for dropping out of college, and I don't know how they would react if I told them I never planned to go back, or have a family, or if I told them what Craig has been doing.

I heard Craig leave my apartment.
Now I can stop pretending to be asleep.
I tried to easily pull my body up from my bed, but my legs and back ached, I couldn't stop shaking.

It'll be okay, just take a shower, wash him from your skin.

I walked into the bathroom and pulled off my shirt, my ribs and back shot pain through my body and I tried not to cry.

I saw bruises on my shoulders, and didn't even try to see how bruised my back was.

I slowly pulled my pants off, trying to be gentle.
I couldn't help but cry out a little, but I finally got them off.

Every step I took was almost unbearable, as it always is the morning after.

I got into the shower and turned it on, letting my body sink to the bottom of the shower.

When I was younger I had aspirations, dreams for myself that I swore to accomplish.
I wanted to be in a band, to be an idol to someone. I wanted to be a doctor, a teacher, a zoologist.

Now I'm just a bookstore employee with no friends, and someone who violates me a few times a week.

I am nothing I wanted to be, how do I forgive myself for that?
How do I recover from this?

Can I recover from this?
The first thing I can do to help myself, is to get away from him.

Perhaps I'm the reason I'm so far gone.
Would therapy help?

I pulled my knees to my chest.
Will the pain ever truly end?
How will it end?
*End is Flashback*
(Vic's POV)

I listened to the philosophical conservation Kellin was having with Alex about the galaxy or something of the sort, he compared it to a human mind.

Jack stared blankly after awhile of having a lost, yet confused expression.

I'm glad they wanted to hang out with me, I've had a really nice night but it's almost time to go.
Kellin let me stop by to feed my fish and I got a few more things from my house, we both decided that it would be best for me to stay at his house for a few days until my court dates are over.
He's being so nice to me.

I feel bad for breaking down on him, even I didn't expect myself to do that, I hardy remember it and I can't believe I did that.
I don't want to kill myself, I just don't know why I acted the way I did.

It scares me.

I could feel the cut on my wrist, I was really going to do it.
Why?
I was overwhelmed after coming home and being alone for the first time in awhile.
I saw the pictures of him in my room, I saw everything that he had anything to do with in there and I felt like I was burning.
I could see it and hear it all over again and I couldn't handle it, I couldn't live in a world where my head was just as much of an enemy as anything else.

Even now, my chest burns and my stomach flips every time I relate anything to it.
I can't help it most of the time.

How will I make it in court?