Infinity and Beyond

1 - Blank Canvas

Emily

It took us absolutely ages to find the right colour for our bedroom walls. First we painted them cream (nice and simple), then decided we'd go for a bold orange (it was our house so why not make the most of doing whatever we wanted?) and then changed it yet again to a pale, baby blue (a colour we both loved). But in the end, after five paint catalogues, nine trips to the DIY store and four layers of different colours, we settled on one, simple colour.

White.

It may seem boring, but to us it was perfect and we couldn't believe we hadn't decided on it sooner. Because this house was ours and it was the start of our new life together - and what better way to start fresh than with a blank canvas? We were the ones who could decide what our future together held and our home was the heart of it. It was the canvas we could paint on to make whatever picture we wanted...which was exactly what we did.

We started with white, three months after we'd moved in, and six months later the wall opposite our bed was covered with photos of our lives. Sitting right in the middle was the frame Ashton's mum and sister had bought, holding the photo of me in his arms that was taken when they got back from buying the frame, and around this were our favourite photos from our favourite moments: the first photo we took together, three years ago in the park in London; one from our first proper date in San Francisco; one of us on the beach on my 21st birthday; one from that Christmas; one that Charlotte took of us at their London concert the first time I got out of the hospital; one of us at the zoo on his birthday that year; one taken out on the balcony the first evening in our house; and finally one from the holiday we took to Mexico last year. We went to Hawaii with Luke, Calum, Michael, Charlotte, Jasmine and Lucy, but whereas they went home after the two weeks there Ashton and I carried on to Mexico and spent a week and a half there together.

The rest of the white wall was hidden with hundreds of moments from the last two and a half years of our lives, all captured into four inch squares. Honestly, every moment we spent together was perfect, and I loved every picture we took together even if it was horrendous, just because it was him. He was the guy that I spent every day with, and in all of the photos on the wall, and whose arms I got to fall asleep in every night.

He was the guy that I loved, and for as long as I could say that, every second was my favourite.

"You okay, love?" Ashton's groggy morning voice pulled me out of my daydream and I turned my head to see him looking fondly down at me. I smiled and nodded as I snuggled closer into his arms and against his chest, looking back at the photo wall that was lit gently by the soft morning light creeping through the curtains. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing," I said quietly and contently.

"You're never thinking about nothing," he giggled, kissing my forehead. "C'mon, what's up?"

"Nothing's up," I replied. "I'm just...happy that I get to spend my time with you."

"I'm happy that I get to spend my time with you too," Ashton smiled. "Although I think I'd enjoy it more if it didn't feel like I was sharing my girlfriend."

"Hey, at least you get Luke!" I chuckled. It had become an ongoing joke that I was actually Charlotte's girlfriend as well as Ashton's, because we'd gotten so close over the last year. I think after everything that happened with the accident I became closer with everyone, but Charlotte was the one person I'd grown to rely on for everything. If Ashton and I had a fight (rarely, but it still happened) she was the first person I was on the phone to, if I needed advice that Ashton couldn't give me I'd be messaging her in an instant and if I was going out anywhere that Ashton didn't want to then I didn't ask anyone else until I'd asked her. Despite hardly spending any time together at the start of our friendship, we now rarely went a week without seeing each other.