Infinity and Beyond

42 - Up In Flames

Ashton

The saying of watching something - hopes, dreams - go up in flames is funny. It's funny, because you never expect it to be literal.

And when people say you never know what you have until you lose it, they never seem to know that it's often not true.

I knew everything I had before I watched it burn in front of my eyes. Every memory, every day spent watching our home being built, every paint fight Emily and I had while decorating our home, our safe place. I knew exactly what I'd lost.

"What the fuck," I breathed, stopping the car and turning the engine off. Emily and I leapt out and ran towards the house, the back of which no longer existed.

"What happened?" Emily shouted at one of the firefighters, who was stood by the truck.

"Is this your house?" he asked when he saw us and we nodded frantically. "One of your neighbours called us out, they said they saw smoke coming from the back."

"When?"

"About a quarter of an hour ago. Lucky they did, we got here before there was too much damage," he explained, sounding far more upbeat than we felt. "It started in the kitchen. Any idea what might have caused it?"

"Oh my god," Emily said suddenly, her face going white. "The oven."

"What about it?" I prompted nervously.

"I was making cookies. Me and my stupid baby brain must have forgotten to turn it off," she whispered. Her voice shook and her eyes filled with tears, so I pulled her into a hug and held her tightly against me.

"This wasn't your fault," I told her, trying to convince myself more than anyone. "You don't know that's what happened."

"But it started in the kitchen! You know me, I've been forgetting everything these days," she cried. I didn't say anything in response, because I physically couldn't. There wasn't anything yet to say it was that, but in all honesty it was quite likely. In the nicest way, her brain had been a bit of a sieve lately and she'd been quite forgetful, so it wasn't out of the question that she could have forgotten to switch the oven off.

"We'll be able to let you know what caused it once it's safe to go inside, but I'll tell the others to bear that in mind. And we'll let you know as well when it's safe to go in. For now I'd recommend finding some place to stay and we'll keep you updated."

We thanked him but it was bittersweet. As kind and helpful as he was, he was only there for one reason and I'd have preferred to never have needed to meet him. We walked away from him with glum faces and sat in silence for a few minutes when we reached the car.

"I'm sorry," Emily said eventually.

"For what?"

"What do you think?"

"It's not your fault."

"You don't know that-"

"Yes I do! Because even if it was the oven, you didn't leave it on on purpose. This is not your fault."

"Sorry anyway," she added quietly and we both laughed. A further few moments of silence passed, and then without another word I turned the engine on and drove away.

The others seemed confused to say the least when we showed up at their house yet again. Calum opened the door and looked slightly taken aback when he saw us standing there and frowned even more when he took in our miserable expressions. He let us in and when we explained everything and asked to stay, he called Luke and Michael out the practice room to talk to them as well. They agreed straight away and while Michael got us both a drink, Luke ran straight upstairs to make sure the room was ready for us.