Glass Wall

Chapter 34

I run as fast I can through the hallways of the school. He has a few minutes head start but I'm positive I can catch him. I tighten the straps on my school bag as I push myself. My calves burn as I use more force to enlarge my strides. My arms pump rapidly at my sides. I burst out the doors into the backyard of the school. I take a few seconds to scan the area.

To my right I notice a black bag. I look back up searching further in the distance. I start running forward guessing the direction he ran in. I near the trees and hear one long scream. I run faster swerving low to the ground to get more balance as I round the trees. I drop my bag next to the table we ate at the other day and continue running.

I come to a full stop as I see Harry with his back turned to me. White smoke lifts into the air and disappears. Something that seemed so real in my eyes have disappeared in the matter of seconds. I recognize the scent. I hate that scent.

I run forward and turn Harry around. His eyes are closed and he doesn't even bother to open them. He blows smoke into my face and I start to get aggravated. I look down at his hands and see the small cigarette that he holds between two fingers.

I rip it out of his hand throwing it at my feet before violently stomping on it.

"Why the fuck are you doing that?! Where the fuck did you get this?!" I yell fuming.

"What's it to you?!" He yells right back at me. His eyes are opened and they're starting to look red.

I scream and stomp on the cigarette harder.

------

"Just try it man." A deep voice says.

"No." My brother answers sternly.

I kneel behind a dumpster as I look on at the scene. My brother sits in a circle with a few guys I've never seen in my life. I followed him here and now I have to suffer the consequences.

I'm shaking at the sight. My brother sits in my line of vision. It's dark outside and he seems to be sitting on wood. A small fire is lit at his feet and the other guys sit in a circle around the fire.

"Pussy just try it."

"I said no." He says turning to whoever talked to him.

"I shouldn't even fucking be here I should be at home taking care of..." He trails off.

"Taking care of your girlfriend?" Someone says snickering.

He shakes his head but doesn't answer. He doesn't want to mention me. Little does he know I'm not home.

"Why did you want me out here anyways?" He asks with a slight hint of annoyance.

"To give you this." Someone else says.

A tall looming figure walks up to my brother. I would've thought my brother would cower down in front of this man but he doesn't. The man is tall and buff. He gives me the creeps.

The man hands him a small bracelet. I can't make out the details of the bracelet from this far.

"It's our gang's bracelet." Someone pitches in.

My brother plays with it in his hands before looking up.

"Alright." He says before putting it on.

"Don't you think a bracelet is girly?" My brother challenges.

"Do you think anyone would actually be looking for a bracelet smart ass? No one cares about bracelets. Bandanas are too obvious. People don't judge what bracelets you wear. Everyone is doing this nowadays to identify their gang members. So fucking wear it." The tall figure growls at him.

My brother gives him a glare before looking down at his feet.

This place is dark and hidden. I can tell why they wanted to meet here. I want to leave but I'm afraid they'll catch me.

"So how's your hot mum?" Someone asks.

"She's getting beat by her boyfriend." Someone else answers.

At first I thought the question was directed at Justin and I was honestly scared to know what he would answer.

Justin doesn't really talk to my parents as much anymore. I think he's distancing himself because of the gang. He doesn't want to hurt them, they wouldn't understand. Now my dad gets angry at my brother because he won't ever do anything with the family. I always try standing up for him but they never listen to me.

"What about your family?" Someone asks.

I notice by brother heavily lift his head.

"Pass me that." He says instead of answering.

"Welcome to the gang kid." The tall figure says.

A solitary tear slowly runs down my face. I know why he wouldn't answer and why he wants to try...that. I can't bare to see him this way. I hate this place. I hate this feeling. I hate the world.

I stand up slowly making sure I'm still hidden by the dumpster. Justin glances my way and I swear he saw my stare. I turn my gaze to the floor to make sure I don't make a noise.

He had the cigarette in his hand and took a puff to wash away the memories and events of his life that were out of his control. He wanted to forget how he was forced into this, forget that he couldn't possibly be a constant figure in my life. He's told me all this.

He's decided to wash it all away with a cigarette.

I run from behind the dumpster as light on my feet as possible. I don't stop to see if they noticed me.

I just run.

------

"Where did you get this Harry?" I say sternly pointing at the ground. He doesn't answer me, he just stares.

I walk towards him right until I'm in his face.

"I said: Where. did. you. get. this?" I say slowly with venom seeping from every word. When he doesn't answer I pound a fist on his chest.

"Answer me!" I scream at him.

"I fucking got it from Bryce that guy back there." He answers emotionless. I scream and turn around walking away. I stop and walk back towards him.

"Why would you do that?!" I yell at him again. I can't contain myself.

"You wouldn't understand." He says through gritted teeth.

"I wouldn't understand? I wouldn't understand?!" I scream at him. I laugh in hysterics at what he said.

"Oh ya? You don't fucking know what I know." I say getting real quiet.

Harry takes a step back. He's not scared I know that for a fact. He takes a step back with a confused look on his face as if he's analyzing me.

"You trying to forget something Styles?" I ask aggressively. He stays silent and continues to look at me in the same manner. I stare at him while breathing heavily because of all the anger I feel. The wind outside picks up and my hair blows across my face.

"Why did you come out here?" He asks suddenly.

"To lecture me? Because I don't need your goddamn advice." He says angrily.

I close my eyes pinching the bridge of my nose.

"I came out here because firstly your friends were concerned and secondly because I knew you were going to do something stupid." I say with my voice as controlled as possible. He looks at me silently while clenching his jaw.

"Harry don't think I don't know anything. I have witnessed more than you think. You may have gone through things that I don't know about but that doesn't make my memories any less important." I say with a serious tone.

"You don't need that shit to get rid of the memories. Running from your problems doesn't help. You have to face them...accept them." I continue.

"Listen to your own advice." He retorts. I laugh unimpressed. My laugh is dry without humour but with pure annoyance.

"You don't think I try? Harry it's easier said than done and I know that for a fact. I haven't told you much at all and you've told me nothing...but smoking away your pain is not the way to go. I know you're stronger than that." I say.

I walk up to him and run my hand down his arm.

"You're stronger than that." I whisper.

He steps back and lightly shrugs off my touch. He puts his hand under my chin and lifts it. It's as if he's inspecting me.

"You're a character and a half." He whispers.

"Ya I get that a lot."