guilty pleasure [bieber]

chapter 14

:༅𐐪𐑂｡:༅𐐪𐑂 :༅｡𐐪𐑂 °

"It's not your fault Naomi" Erin tries to reassure me. I knew better though; it was both mine and Justin's. We were either right for each other and had a shitty way of showing it or we just didn't belong together and were trying to make the impossible work.

A week had passed since Justin had come home; worry consumed me. Was he alright? Did he have a place to stay? Of course he did. Was he eating? He had stormed out that morning in such a rage taking nothing with him that I couldn't help but think the worst–especially since he was refusing to answer my phone calls and texts. I just hoped that wherever he was that he was safe.

:::

It was now Wednesday and I was getting Stella ready. My mom was flying in. Logan all the way in Paris heard about what happened; I assumed from Trevor and called her. Which I guess was nice of her to be worried but why not call me? Why not talk to me and ask me how I felt. Asked what I wanted instead of doing what she's done time and time again. I sigh putting on Stella's last sock.

When I hear a noise come from downstairs I quickly pick up Stella and make my way down there. Mom was here early, but I wasn't complaining. On top of Justin leaving Stella had been keeping me up all night. The last time she'd done this was when we first got home from the hospital almost three months ago.

Once we make it to the last step I realize that it isn't my mom, but Justin. He's trying to get in.

I quickly rush over to the door; taking a much needed deep breath before unlocking it for him.

"I would have gotten it." He says so coldly that I physically get chills. I don't say anything as he steps over the threshold instead I just look at him. His hair is disheveled and the bags under his eyes are dark.

Has he even been to work?

My heart breaks, but I can't find the words to say. What do you say to someone whose heart you've broken? You don't say anything because you can't and without so much as another word; he climbs the stairs skipping every other one in search of whatever it is that he's come to get.

As I'm about to close the door Trevor walks in. His hands are in his suit pockets and his demeanor apathetic.

"What are you doing here?"
"I drove Justin here."

I can't help, but wonder if he was mad at me as well? His loyalty was to Justin after all. Would he wash his hands clean of me if things didn't work out? My stomach collapses at the thought. I'd thought of him as much more than just a friend. He was like a brother to me.

I couldn't lose everyone the thought is terrifying

"Don't worry, we'll be gone soon. He just came to get some things." Just as I had guessed he had been staying with Trevor. I nod and look down at Stella. She yawns as the room falls silent as Trevor waits

I'm stagnant in my spot. Not that I wanted to move anyway. I wanted to wait for Justin, to see him again before he left. I didn't want to say what I had done was a mistake because I felt like I was doing this for the better, but I couldn't help but miss him every night I laid in bed and he wasn't there.

"He's hurting you know–bad. I've never seen him this way and I gotta say it's even breaking my heart."

I look over at Trevor with sad eyes.

"I'm not trying to hurt him."

"I'm not saying you are, but–nevermind. I don't want you to think I'm taking sides because i'm not. I love him like a brother and you as if you were my sister." I understood. I really did, but in order for us to get in a good place we both had to change. Not just him and not just me. Either we changed or we finally went our separate ways.

Just as I'm about to say something Justin is coming back down the stairs with a duffle bag in his hands.

I take yet another deep breath as he hits the last stair.

"I'll go wait in the car." Trevor murmurs loud enough for me to hear him. He pulls me and Stella into his embrace; placing a chaste kiss on my cheek and Stella's forehead before leaving back out the door.

I'm expecting Justin to stop and say something to me. To kiss Stella on her cheek–anything. But he doesn't.

He doesn't stop and with his hand wrapped around the door knob I know he's about to leave and I don't know when we'll see him again.

"Do you really think this is going to help?" His voice is husky.

"I–I don't know." The words linger in the air for a moment.

I couldn't tell you what was running through his mind even if I tried. I've never been good at reading him. His words and the way he spoke always gave how he was feeling away. I however always felt like such an open book to him. He knew my mind, body and soul.

"I'm not sure of anything. I believe it's for the best and I hope we can be good again, but no one knows what the future holds Justin—" He shakes his head as if the words angered him further. He finally opens the door; I can see the pain in his eyes as he takes once last glance our way before slamming the door on his way out.