Fame

15

"Well, I've gotta get back to my seat. So I'll see you later okay?"Toni replied as we pulled back from each other.

"See you later."I winked.

"Your number is still the same right?"She asked, before walking away.

"Yeah it is. You can call me later."I smiled and she walked away.

Right after she walked away, I saw Tupac walking up. He didn't acknowledge me though. He kept walking as if I wasn't even standing there.

"Well hello to you too stranger."I smacked my lips and pushed him.

"Oh wassup."he said dryly.

"Damn. That's all I get, oh wassup."I chuckled, but he didn't laugh with me. He just looked at me as if he was ready to end the conversation.

"I mean, we didn't end on the best terms Jay and Dada don't really want me talking to you. She said she don't trust you."He shrugged.

"What? She has no reason not to trust me. I heard you got married, no invite?"I added.

"I wanted to invite you, but Dada wasn't comfortable with that. I told her everything. She knows Janet, it's not a secret anymore. You tell me if you would want someone that your fiancé used to love in your wedding?"He asked sarcastically and walked away.

I had no idea what to say, my mouth went dry. I didn't have a response for that.

"Wait. What are you trying to say?"I turned around almost chasing him.

"I'm trying to say that I loved you and I wanted us to be something but you were too selfish to see that. I was here for you, when nobody was. At your lowest, I was there. When that nigga took all your shit and left you, I was there for you Janet. When you found that nigga was gay after y'all hadn't had sex in forever, I was there. That ain't mean nothing to you."He replied.

"It did. I loved you too. I was just trying to protect myself."I answered, looking down at my feet.

"Protect yourself? Protect yourself from who Janet? I ain't never hurt you. I ain't never fuck you over. Why the fuck you felt like you had to protect yourself from me? If I ain't love you, I would have left you to deal with all that shit alone."He started to get loud, because he was getting upset.

"You ain't love me. You don't even love your damn self and you wanna know how I know?"He asked angrily.

"How?"I replied with a stray tear falling from my eye.

"After all the times I showed you that I loved you, you went out fucking other people and came back to tell me about it. I know you don't love yourself because of all the stuff you've put yourself through. Rene, Bobby, Lana, Toni, Wanya."He said.

My eyes got big at mentioning of my friend Wanya Morris.

(A/N: Shoutout to Ky for this tea. 😂)

"Yeah, you ain't think I knew about that shit huh? You gotta do better Janet. I talked with him. He ain't trying to be with you. You a joke to him. I brought your name up and you know what that nigga said? That nigga said, Maybe she'll make a tape with me too and laughed."He added, getting louder as if we weren't still backstage at the VMAs.

I cried at the way he was telling me off, but it was truthful. I needed to hear all of this.

"I wanted to beat that nigga up, but I had to realize it ain't my job to save you nomore. You a grown ass woman and you gone do what you wanna do, but you gotta do better. Toni is better, Toni loves you. I know she does."He said.

"How do you know?"I sniffled and wiped my nose.

"She doesn't hate you for what you did to her. She still wants to try with you. She still wants to give you and her a chance. I saw how happy she was when you spoke to her and when you hugged her."He replied.

"Go get your girl Janet. She wants to be with you and I know you want to be with her too."He added.

"I don't want to hurt her. She deserves better than me Pac. Ima cheater and a liar. You said it yourself, I don't love myself so how will I love her?"I asked, finally making eye contact with him for the first time since the beginning of the conversation.

"You don't have to love her now. Take things slow. Don't have sex, just get to know her and fall in love with her being and her personality."He smiled.

I walked up to him and hugged him as tight as I could.

"Thank you. You're the only person who isn't afraid to put me in my place."I laughed through the tears that were still on my face.

"I love you Pac."I added and he kissed my forehead.

"I love you too."He smiled.

"Can we still be friends? I don't want you out of my life anymore. I missed you and all our shenanigans." I said as I pulled back from him.

"I don't think that's a good idea Janet. We've hurt each other too much and the two of us collectively hurt Dada too much, but you can speak whenever you see me."He smiled and shrugged.

"Okay."I replied and hugged him again.

"You be good to her okay?"I added.

"I will. Go get your girl. Treat her right this time too."He replied.

"I will."I smiled and walked away.

I'm gonna miss him so much.

I walked back out the crowd to find Toni. The seat next to her was empty so I sat in it.

"Hey you."I whispered in her ear and she blushed.

"Hey. Where you been?"She asked.

"I was just catching up with a friend. Are you busy after this?"I asked.

"Well, I was going to goto the after party but if you had something else in mind I'm down."She smiled.

"Let's go out and get to know each other better. Like a re-do of our first date or whatever you want to call that."I replied and she smiled.

"I'd like that very much" she smiled and grabbed my hand.

This starting over thing is making me feel better already.

I'm sooo sorry for making you guys wait this long for this update. I've been so busy.