Living with the Dead.(twd)

Help! (137)

MADISONS POV.
I keep my bow close by my side when I walk over to Maggie's house incase someone was hiding, ready to attack again. I haven't seen anyone other than Carl, Judith, Jenna, Ron and Enid and I don't even care about half of those people.

I'm anxious to see everybody so I know they're alive. I presumed I might find Ron on the road but he's still no where to be found and I worry that he might not have made it home.

Juat as I reach the porch of Maggie and Glenn's house I hear rustling in a near by bush.
I quickly load my bow and aim.
"Get out! I know someones there, come out!" I yell.
A man emerges but without a 'W' on his forehead. He wears a long coat and dirty, ripped jeans as if he had been outside the walls for years. He has smooth, coffee coloured skin and holds a stick that is covered in blood on either end.
"Relax. I'm a friend of Rick Grimes. Do you know him?" He asks.
"Yeah, how do you know him?" I ask.
"I was with him when this all started. I looked after him and he helped me and my son." He explains.
He moves closer and I tighten the string on my bow and he haults with his hands in the air in surrender.
"My names morgan." He tells me.
"Why were you hiding?" I question.
He looks down at his foot and my eyes follow. His ankle is swollen and stained a blue-black color.
"I wasn't hiding, I fell. Took me a while to get back up, as you can see." He points out.

Glenn runs out of his door and stands infront of my bow.
"Are you crazy? My hand could've slipped! I could have just killed you!" I scold.
"This man is with us. He's a good man, he's Rick's friend. He got here a few days ago. Daryl and Aaron found him." He explains.
"Jesus, I nearly killed him. Why doesn't anyone tell us stuff around here?" I complain.
"I'll pass that message onto Rick for you." He chuckles and pats my shoulder. I put my bow back and glance inside the house.
"Glenn, is Maggie and Beth okay?" I ask nervously.
"They're fine. Go inside, they're watching tv." He informs me.

I run up the porch steps and into the house. I find Beth sprawled across the couch and Maggie sits in a chair in the corner of the room reading a book
I sigh in relief.
Once they see me they spring up and hug me.
"I was so worried. Thank god you're okay." Maggie whispers.
"I was having a panic attack. Everyone is scattered and I didn't know where you were." Beth explains.
"I'm fine. So is Carl and Judith. Have you seen anyone else?" I ask.
"Abraham, Rosita, Sasha and Eugine. They're all safe." Maggie tells me.
"Mads what happened you're covered in blood." Beth worries.
"Not my blood. I had to kill some of the 'W' people." I tell them.
"Who even were they?" Beth asks.
"Thats the million dollar question." I sigh.

Maggie ushers me to sit down.
"Maggie I need to tell Beth." I say.
"Tell me what?" She demands.
"Are you sure Mads?" Maggie asks.
"Yeah, i'm sure. Everyone is going to find out soon anyways." I sigh.
"WHATS GOING ON?" Beth yells.
"I'm pregnant." I mutter.
Utter shock crosses Beth's face and her eyes glance down to my stomach and then back up to my face. She frowns and then suddenly a smile breaks across her face.
"Girl you are too much. You nearly got me there. Good one." She laughs and slaps her knee repeatedly.
"Beth, she's serious." Maggie retorts.
"Oh man, she's got you in on this too?"  Beth chuckles again.
"Beth!" I whine frustatedly.
She squints her eyes and glances down to my stomach again.
"No you can't be ..... I mean.... you...no...." She mumbles not quite connecting the dots yet.
She continues to mumble her thoughts aloud. "No.... I mean you've only ever been with Carl...... you couldn't be.... You haven't even had sex since..... the woods I guess but...... OH MY GOD THE WOODS!!" She yells in realisation.
"Shut up Beth, someone will hear you." I scold.
"Madison Smith, you tell me now that this isn't some sick prank." Beth croaks while her lower lip wobbles.
"Beth I wouldn't joke about this."
Then Beth starts to cry.
"How could you have been so stupid Mads? You're knocked up in the middle of an apocolypse." She grits her teeth.
I stand to my feet and ball my fists together in anger.

She's your best friend. You can't hit her.

"Screw you Beth, do you think I asked for this? I hate it!" I yell and when she tries to stand to her feet I push her and she slaps my arms away.
"Well what do you expect? Do you know whats gonna happen to you!" She cries.
Maggie pushes us apart.
"Screaming at each other isn't going to solve anything girls!" Maggie interrupts but Beth and I continue on as if we hadn't heard her.
"YES I KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS! If you were referring to my death sentence in eight more months, then yes, I know whats gonna happen, but I came to you because I thought you would understand, not tell me how stupid I am and shut me down. Thanks a lot Beth. I wanted to tell you first Beth, no offence Maggie, but your sister found out first and boy am I glad it was her and not you, because she never looked at me like I was already dead like you just did." I sob.

Total silence fills the room and I have to breath slowly in and out to relax. Maggie stands between us with her arms crossed waiting for one of us to talk. I catch Maggie giving Beth a scolding look. Beth sighs and opens her mouth to speak.
"Mads i'm sorry okay, I just.... freaked. I can't lose anybody else. Especially you. I told you i'd always have your back, but this is out of my control. I didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry." She apologises.
I sigh and my breathing gets quicker.
"It's fine, I just, i'm trying to keep this together so bad Beth, but im so scared." I cry and she pulls me into a hug and rubs my back while I soak her shoulder with tears.

Maggie leaves the room so we can talk
"The thing I don't understand is i've always been ready to die, i've cheated death so many times, so why am I so scared now? What makes this time so different?" I mumble into her shoulder.
"Shhhh, it's okay, we'll figure everything out. Does Carl know?" Beth asks.
"No, just you and Maggie." I explain.
"Mads, you have to tell Carl. He has every right to know. He's the father of this baby." She tells me.
"I know Beth, I know. I just know when I tell him everything will change. He won't want this baby. I'll do this alone for my final months and all the while he'll look at me like a kicked puppy or worse, he'll just hate me." I sob.
"You don't know that Carl doesn't want this baby." Beth replies.
"I know Carl. He won't want it."
"He doesn't hate you." Beth adds.
"Yeah he does. He told me today, we got in a fight. I said it first, but I didn't mean it, then when he said it back it hit me like a ton of bricks."
"He said that to you?" She asks shocked. I nod ny head.
"Carl could never hate you even if he tried Mads. I know you love him but maybe it's time to move on. If he doesn't want this baby then you need to find someone who truely makes you happy no matter what you have going on in your life. Maybe it's time to stop looking for happiness in the same place you lost it." She tells me.
"Do you have any new male friends in here?" She asks.
"Ron. But just before I came here we had a fight. I don't know how it happened. All I know is when he left it hurt." I explain.
"You like him and if he fought with you it means he cares." She adds.
"I need to talk to him soon,  but for now I need to find everyone else and see if they're okay and then i'm going to sleep 'cause i'm tired." I amend.
"Good. You patch things up with Ron and tell Carl and Rick. They deserve to know. This is big for them. Carl is going to be a Dad and Rick is gonna be a grampa." She explains then her eyes go wide.
"I never thought I would say those words. This is crazy." She says.
"Your telling me." I mutter.
"You go get some rest." Beth instructs and I nod my head. I wave goodbye to Maggie in the kitchen and I walk over to my own house. When I walk in it's completly deserted.
"Rick?" I call out.
"Michonne?"
No answer.
I walk upstairs and knock on Carl's door before entering to see if he was there, maybe I'll just get everything over and done with and just tell him right now.
Oh he was there alright.
But he wasn't alone.
I clutch my heart when I take in the sight of Enid and Carl together. His lips inches from hers her hand on his.
All I can do is stare and when he pulls away he looks at me with sympathy.
"Mads.... i'm sorry I..."
"Doesn't matter." I croak.
I shut the door and run to my ensuite bathroom to throw up and it's not even the sickness. Just the thought of Carl with her makes me sick.
All I can think of is Beth's words.
"Maybe it's time to stop looking for happiness in the same place you lost it."