Traveling Vivian

Chapter SeventySeven - Power of Love

They always said love will always find you and when it does, it lures you in a state of ecstasy where nothing else matters in the world besides your lover and yourself, cuddling in a warm embrace. They never told me how much love can hurt when your significant other is ill. Every emotion of my heart flew through the door as I felt the loneliness crept up on my skin. I was alone and not even my two children can help me with this pain. I waited patiently as my heart skipped beats every time I walked by Jax's room. My autumn days became colder as the ticking tock silently rocked along the minutes and the days became shorter as the moon rise before dinner.

To add to my abundance of loneliness, I found out I was pregnant with a baby girl. I knew instantly it was Jax's and I knew we would be a happy family when he woke up from his coma. I found out I was four months along after the attack with Jax's enemies. The days were packed with impatience and lots of waiting. I had to wait for Jax's recovery and revival as well as waiting for the arrival of my newest daughter.

I tried to explain to Ella she was going to have a baby sister but she replied, "Don't you think Bentley is enough?" It caused a chuckle out of me but I agreed. However, I found out too late for the baby to be gone but again, I refused to kill another innocent creature. Some many things always came out wrong in my life and I was destined to actually make this one work. I wanted to keep Ella, Bentley and Jax along with this new baby. I didn't want us to separate. We could be happy. We could be a perfect family if Jax gave up his career.

The doctor said talking to the patient was the best way to revive him but I knew it would take more than that. It was about a month now and Jax slept in his peaceful sleep, unaware of his surroundings. Sometimes I wondered if he was walking in the Heaven's land, talking to my lost loved ones or if he was taking a glimpse of the afterlife. Whatever he was doing, he must know I needed him here. I wanted to tell him about the baby, about quitting his career, and settling in a decent job. He had three degrees; surely, he will find a good job to provide for all of us! I rocked his hand and wept as I missed his waking days. I wanted my love back!

The days quickly became weeks as I did my usual routine. I woke up in our temporary hotel rooms and got the kids out of bed. Ella was about three and now attending preschool and Bentley was two. He was talking, walking and every day he looked a lot like Daddy. Every time I looked at Bentley and he smiled brightly at me, he reminded me of Linlee. He had her smile and her luscious blue eyes. Then the kids would march down the street with me as we dropped Ella at school and I would wait for the five hours by sitting at the library, reading books to Bentley or having lunch at a local eatery. Then when noon rolled around, I picked Ella up and then, taking a cab, we would return to the hospital to see Jax, my love. Every day repeated and for the past month, it was always like this and I slowly began to lose hope.

Christmas was approaching and the past month, I visited Jax twice a week only because Ella cried out, "DADDY DIED!" in public and I didn't want her to think so. Whenever I did visit him, I was alone. Ella and Bentley were growing quick and as the festivities rolled around and decorated the streets, I knew it was another Christmas without a love. I sighed as I stared at the fireplace. I hung our socks up as Christmas songs rang from the dock and Ella and Bentley helped decorated our Christmas tree.

"What do you think Santa is bringing you this year?" I asked.

Ella smiled at me in her red and white puffy dress, "A pony! And a doll house and lots of candy!"

"Oh lots of candy, eh?" I asked.

"Yes! Chocolate cookies and mint patties! And I also want a trike!"

"Well let's see if Santa does bring you those toys. What about Bentley? What would he want?" I asked.

Ella thought decisively as she tapped her head. "He gets coal!"