Suzaku

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Lelouch can walk around normally now.

That's to be expected though. After all it has already been a month since he woke up and started the rehabilitation. I still haven't let him go outside....

I feel bad for this but I can't muster up the courage to tell Nunally...

As for Lelouch's behavior at the moment....
He is usually pretty cheerful. More cheerful than the original Lelouch...

But at times, usually when I am looking away, I can see his eyes darkening....

I am sure he still feels guilty about killing Euphy...

I feel bad for doing this to him... not only did I make him feel guilty for something he doesn't remember but on top of that I told him to continue being cheerful in front of me....

Lelouch.... I don't want you to be sad anymore.... so please.... don't do this to me again.....

"Suzaku-oniisan, it's your turn. Do you have any intention of playing?"

"Eh? Ah... you are right...."

We were playing chess yet again. And Lelouch was winning again.

He didn't even focus on the game though as he was simultaneously reading a novel I had brought him.

Lately, I have been bringing him many things...

He always finishes one or two books in a day... his concentration was amazing!

"Checkmate."

"....Ah...." I sighed...

"Suzaku-oniisan you have to try being less obvious."

"Y-yeah... I guess so...."

"So what do you want to do now?"

"Hmm.... I want to sleep with you~"

"Eh!? Where did this come from?"

"I was just thinking how cute you are when I was watching you~"

He blushed and looked away shyly.

I always knew Lelouch was this cute but him acting like a little child intensifies this....

"Uum... I guess it's fine.... if we cuddle a bit....."

He said while facing the other way.

I half-jumped, half-hugged him.

He started complaining about the chess pieces getting knocked over and lost. (They were playing chess on the bed)

I chuckled and got up. We both picked up the pieces and put them away.

Then I just did exactly the same and fell over him.

"Ah geez! Just do whatever you want!" He said giving up.

We slept together that day.

I was happy we could be here, like this now.

Thinking that people will learn Lelouch is alive is scaring me.

What if somebody tries to kill him...?

What ifs just keep popping up in my head. I get so scared. I haven't even told Nunally yet...

The next day I had work in the morning and came back late in the afternoon.

Lelouch looked at me with a grim expression when I came back...

"What's wrong Lelouch?"

"....kill me..." I heard him whisper. I wasn't sure if he said that, and I didn't want to believe it so I asked him to repeat.

"KILL ME!"

He said again yelling this time... I can't stand this anymore.... Just the thought of killing the person I love once again was too much for me...

My legs gave up and I fell to my knees with hot tears running down my face..

Lelouch looked over at me in suprise and hurried to my side.

"A-are you okay!?"

I am so pathetic. I always always cry. Even though Lelouch always puts a strong front.... I am so weak.... when I am sad I will always cry.... I can't control this.... I feel ashamed of myself for showing this sight to this Lelouch.

"Suzaku-oniisan! Suzaku-oniisan!!"

I didn't have the power to reply... I felt so drown in my own little world I could hardly hear his voice.

"Hey!!! What's up!?? Answer me!! Suzaku!!"

Ah... he called me Suzaku.... after so long I get to hear my name from his mouth. The tone was the same the previous Lelouch used.

I felt so happy at the moment I think I completely lost myself.

The next thing I knew I was lying in my bed and Lelouch was next to me looking over me.

"Suzaku-oniisan! Are you awake!?"

"Y-yeah.... sorry seems like I worried you...."

"No it's my fault for saying strange things so suddenly."

"Lelouch.... do you want to die? That's why you said that?"

"....today.... while you were away.... I heard two people outside the door.... probably servants talking about the dark emperor Lelouch.... that's me right!? I did all those but things, right!"

I felt sad to see his guilty yet strong face again.

"Lelouch... I will tell you only this."

"?"

"You always did what you did for the sake of others. For world happiness and for your friends. You even died leaving such a bad fame behind because you wanted world peace. So please..... never.....never..... never again ask me to kill you.... I can't take it.... I don't want to feel like that again....."

"..........Suzaku-oniisan.... were you.... the one who attacked me? And nearly killed me..........?"

(Oooops?)

To be continued........
________________________
Suzaku what are you saying to the poor soul!??? Be careful what you say!!!! Aghhh I can't wait for next month~ Damn fingers for stopping at a cliff hanger!!! >~<
Anyway. I also want to say this.
"Hope you had a nice suzalulu week!" It was the rerun this week xD I did again~ check my tumblr to see my drawings~ (judaluffy)
And also heard the news??? Lelouch of the Regenaration is coming~~ I can't wait!! I can't wait for what new pains sunrise will bring me xD

Anyway see you next month~

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