Give My All

Kabanata 20

"You're late." Isang boses ang nagsalita mua sa likuran ko. I was busy looking for my locker key. Hindi ko man lang napansin na nasa likuran ko siya. Iniisip ko tuloy baka nadaanan ko siya kanina at hindi ko lang napansin.

"Are you always like this Eina? Napapansin ko, simula nang dumating ako dito, halos hindi kita makitang maagang pumasok? Is there a problem?" Panimulang tanong niya. I can't utter a word, it's my fault. "You're not being professional Eina, trabaho 'to. Don't tell me kaibigan kita, I won't tolerate this kind of routine, nakakasira sa company ang mga ganyang attitude. Isa pa, gusto mo bang gayahin ka ng mga jbang empleydao dito? You should be aware of the time, always be aware." Masungit niyang saad. Nakikita kong napapatingin sa akin ang ibang empleyado na madaan sa gawi namin. "I'm sorry, Sir." Mahina kong tugon.

"Wala nang next time Eina, this will be the last time na male late ka, or else I'll have your station clear." Malamig na tono niya.

Napatango nalang ako sa sinabi niya. He's cold? I wonder why? Baka naman may napag- awayan sila agad ni Kimi dora. Ang bilis naman ata. Kahapon lang naging aila tapos ngayon LQ na, and the worse part is, nadamay ako. Partly, kasalanan ko, late nanaman ako.

This is all Sean's fault, he's the one responsible kaya ako na late. Hindi niya pa ako pinauwi kagabe, kung saan-saan pa kami namasyal, nakarating pa nga kaming Luneta Park.

I admit masaya siyang kasama, walang dull moments. Kasi kund hindi kami nagtatawanan, nagbabangayan naman kami about random things. Nilibre niya pa akong fishball, and I cant believe na ang isang mayamang katulad niya kumakain ng ganoong klaseng pagkain. Doon ko din nalaman na galing din pala sa hirap ang nanay niya, hindi namang hirap na hirap, nasa middle class ganoon. Nagpunta ng Paris ang nanay niya para magtrabaho doon at doon na rin nakilala ang tatay niya who happens to be a tourist there. And that just it, nagkakilala sila doon and everything is a story.

"Mam Eina. Buti po dumating na kayo. Maint po ang ulo ni Sir Alexander ngayon. Kanina pa kayo hinahanap. Nakailang balik na nga yan dito e." Pambungad na salita ni Travis sa akin. "Kaya nga mainit ang ulo, napagalitan ako kasi late nanaman ako." Kwento ko naman sa kanya. Agad namang nagtaka ang reaksiyon niya sa sinabi ko. Kahit din naman ako, ito ang unang beses na nagalit siya sa akin. I was appalled when he yell at me. I never expected that he would shout at me and worse ipahiya pa ako sa harap ng maraming tao.

"Eleina, mainit ata ang ulo ni Mr. Alexander, kahapon lang ang ayos naman niya. Nakikipagkwentuhan pa nga siya sa mga crew dito e." Komento naman ni Simoun. I just smiled at him. Kahit ako man nagtataka sa inakto niya. I mean, we had dinner last night at wala naman akong nakikitang dahilan niya para maging masungit sa akin. Naisip ko tuloy. Maybe they are not in good terms ng jowawa niyang explorer thats why he's so grumpy.

The day was a blast, hindi ko na nga namalayan that it's almost 9 in the evening kung hindi pa tatawag si Sean sa akin. He told me he's just outside and will wait for me. Gosh!' Masyado na ba akong engrossed sa ginagawa ko at hindi ko na namalayan ang oras? For sure, lala is so mad nanaman kasi it's late na, kung ano-anong orasyon nanaman ang maririnig ko sakanya. I just shrugged the thought off.

Inayos ko ng lahat ng gamit ko saka ako nagtungo palabas. "Kanina kapa?" Pambungad ko sa kanya. He meet me half way then hugged me. Nagulat naman ako sa ginawa niya. I was about to push him when he spoke. "Don't. He's looking. Just play along Eleina." He said with a stern voice. Saka siya kumalas ng yakap. He looked behind me, "Dude, what's up?" Lumayo naman ako ng konti sa kanya, they fist-bump. "Wala. Pauwi na ako actually. I-I was waiting f-for Eina here kasi ang akala ko hindi mo siya masusundo." Xander said then looked at me. Hindi ako nakasagot sa sinabi niya. Did he just told us na he's waiting for me?! Anong meron? E kanina lang kung pagalitan niya ako para akong kung sino lang sa kanya.

I was hurt, given the fact na late nga ako and that he has all the rights to be mad at me kasi siya ang boss namin, but that doesn't gave him the right to humiliate me in front of anybody. I admit na it was my fault, I was being incompetent or whatever he may call it, but it doesn't justify what he had done to me a while ago.

"You don't have to, I'm the boyfriend here Xander. I know what my responsibilities being his man it's my duty to do it." Mariing wika ni Sean, sabay hawak sa kamay ko. I gulped. I can't seem to digest whatever it is he's saying. Alam kong pakulo niya lang ang lahat ng to, pero pakiramdam ko tumatayo lahat ng balahibo sa katawan ko every damn time he say the word "girlfriend." "I know, but you came late Sean, kaya naisip kong hintayin siya." Balik naman ni Xander. "But I am here na, so you could do whatever you want, maybe you should go and pick your girl, it would be a very nice option to that." Maanghang ang mga salitang binibitiwan ni Sean sa kanya.

I could see that Xander's not happy of what Sean had said. Nakakuyom na ang mga kamay nito at mahahalata na din ang pagtagis ng bagang niya. "I was just being nice Sean. Isa pa, you should know the right time to pick her up, it's late and it's not a pleasing sight for a woman to go home at this time of the night, plus the fact that's she's my friend and I care about her." Madiing wika din ni Xander. Oh my gosh! Are they seriously picking a fight in front of me?

"Enough!" I exclaimed. "Pagod ako and the last thing I want to do is to be the referee sa away inyong dalawa. I said then walked out on them.

"Eina!" "Eleina!" Magkasabay na sigaw nila.

Nagtuloy lang ako sa paglakad palayo sa kanilang dalawa. I can't stand them. "Eleina!" Muling tawag ni Sean, I can still hear them arguing with something pero masyado akong malayo para marinig 'yon, and I'm too pissed to even listen.

"What's wrong with yoy?! Why are you walking away from me?! Kung meron mang dapat kang iwan dito si Xander yon and definitely not me!" Sean hissed at me. Tinulak siya kaya naman bahagya siyang napaatras palayo ng konti sa akin. "Do you really wanna know my problem?! You! Ikaw! Kayong dalawa! Mga bwisit kayo! Lubayan niyo nga ako pwede?! If you don't have anything to do with your life then fucking leave me alone and let me be!" Sigaw ko sa kanya. He just gazed at me, and I did the same, then he smirked. "Whatever Eleina. I told you to play along didn't I?" He asked me. I looked away.

"Why the fuck did you do that?! What you did back there gave him the idea na hindi tayong dalawa. You walked away from me, I called you many times and yet you keep on ignoring me. Why is that?"

"I can't! Ok! He's my friend and I can't just let you say those words to him." Sigaw ko naman. "Do you think he cares?! Huh?" He asked me. Hindi naman ako nakaimik sa sinabi niya. "News flash Eleina, he didn't, that's why I'm here and I'm helping you! Did you see the way he stare at you? Eleina, the guy obviously didn't know how he really feels, that's why I'm here, cliché it may sound but if this is the only way we'll know his true feelings, then I'm telling you now, you can't blow this one. You just have to trust me on this." Sabi niya sa akin.

"Goodnight." Sabi ni Sean sa akin. Tumingin naman ako sa kanya at tipid na ngumiti. I'm still inside his car. Pansin kong nakailaw pa ang buong bahay namin, paniguradong gising pa sila lala. Nanonood pa siguro yong dalawa. "Thanks for the ride, and a- goodnight." Nahihiyang sabi ko sa kanya. He smiled back. "Anything for you sweet Eleina." He said while smiling. Bigla naman akong nailang sa tinawag niya sa akin. I feel like my heart beats faster than the usual. 

Tipid akong ngumiti saka lumabas ng sasakya niya. I waited until he leaved. I sigh as I walk papasok ng bahay. I was about to knock on the door when someone get a hold of me. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng takot. What if someone wants to hurts me. Bigla kong naisip, but hen who would do that in the first place e wala naman akong kaaway? I can feel my heart raging. As if it will blast out on my chest anytime, but then when I smelled that familiar scent.

"Eina." Mahina ngumit madiing wika niya mula sa likod ko. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng ginhawa. For the moment there, I thought hihiwalay ang kaluluwa ko sa katawan ko. Hinarap ko siya. "Gosh Xander----

"Alex, it's Alex. Yun ang tawag mo sa akin dati. And I want you to call me Alex again just like before." He said with a stern voice. "A-Alex." Namutawi ko. He smiled at me. "Good. Now, come with me." Biglang sabi niya sabay hila sa akin papalabas ng gate namin. I was reluctant at first, pero nang makita ko ang mukha niya ng tamaan ng ilaw ng poste sa tapat ng gate namin, all my inhibitions were gone. It's like I lost my sanity. Hindi ko na alam kung anong iisipin pa, basta ang alam ko lang,

I wanna be with him, kahit sandali lang, kasi sa totoo lang, I can't help but miss him.