Stay. (Completed!)

Chapter 29: note #2

Day 2
I'm still writing. I can't lie I miss you truly Blake. But if only you were here. I nee you here. I want you here by my side playing with my hair as I smile. Our love wasn't based on words but by actions. Our love wasn't ordinary it was one in a million. I die everyday thinking about you but did you know that living is harder than dying. Breathing without you is harder than breathing when I'm with you. Do you feel me? I want you to feel me. I want you to forgive me I want to hear it from your soft lips that comforted me with the words coming out of it and the soft kisses you used to give. I want your warm hands to wrap around my waist as I felt safe in your arms. I want to see your messy hair when you wake up in the morning and see you spending minutes to make it look as perfect as it does everyday. I miss you calling my name...

I closed the note book and put the pen in between it as I placed it on the bed stand next to my bed. Donny walked in holding a glass of water. He handed it to me as I drank it slowly. I walked to the bathroom to wash my face. I looked at my self in the mirror as I saw tear stains on my cheeks. My lips were dry and I looked like I had just woken up from the dead. I let the sink water drown my hands. And splashed the water on my face. I decided to take a shower so I picked up a clean towel and picked up some black pyjamas from my closet I put them aside and opened the water. I  walked into the hot steamy water letting in crawl down my spine and body. I stayed in there for about 45 minutes. I walked out wrapping the towel around my body. I put on my cloths and put my hair in a messy bun. Even though it was wet. I went out to see my brother sitting on the edge of my bed. He looked up to see me as he got up and walked to me. He held me in a hug as he knew what I was feeling.

"It'll be fine." He tried to convince me.

~~

Day 3

I woke up in the same spot. I haven't gotten out of my room since the incident. I'm trying to forget but I can't your like this love song that is stuck in my head. I'm currently sitting in front of the window that's in my room. You're like an old memory. The kind that never leaves your mind. We're that memory. The one that you want to forget but you can't.  You don't want to.  You feel the need to keep it. But if you lose it you lose yourself with it. But the problem is that I'm already lost , Blake. I'm lost without you. Sometimes I want to kill myself just to forget the pain. I don't want to live in a world without you.