Vengeance

Chapter Ten

Deterioration.

“Bella! Bella, wake up!”

Rosalie’s high-pitched squeal finally roused me from my stupor. As I blinked rapidly, I started trembling as my midsection erupted into a symphony of agony. My stomach burned and radiated pain into every part of my body making me convulse in misery. The sharp tendrils of aching stretched down to my calves and snaked its way up to my head, causing a migraine. As I writhed in pain, Esme’s words ricocheted through my mind. Bella, maybe we should change your bandages.

I looked up, met Rosalie’s worried and scornful glare, and cringed under the blankets. “Rosalie?” My voice was broken and barely a whisper, although I knew she heard me. “What’s going on?”

“What’s going on?” Rosalie demanded as her eyebrows pulled together in anger and she crossed her arms at her chest. “Bella, your stitches are infected and you’ve got a staph infection – that’s what’s going on!”

My mind made every attempt to recall what I learned in health class about staph infections. Oh darn it, think Bella, think! Staph infections can cause sweats, pain, septicemia, and…hallucinations.

I felt my mouth and eyes open wide as my memories registered to me but couldn’t find any words. As I proceeded to babble incoherently, the pain in my midsection worsened and sent ripples of fire throughout me. Gripping my stomach, I cried out at the incomprehensible pain that accompanied the action.

The door opened and Esme rushed in, her face appearing a little paler than usual. “She’s awake,” she sighed with relief before visually inspecting me.. “How are you feeling Bella?”

A tear slipped down my cheek as the pain was reduced to a soft tingling feeling. “Esme, what happened?”

“Bella, you passed out.,” Esme’s expression became pained and she refused to look at me. “We assumed that you were still sleeping off the last of the anesthesia, but then you started thrashing in your sleep. Figuring you were having a nightmare, we tried to wake you but it wouldn’t work.” Her fingers moved anxiously in her seat and she raised her eyes to me. “We thought you were in a coma, but then—“

“You started talking in your sleep,” Rosalie grumbled beside her mother and raised her eyebrows at me. “Something about Edward—and a sea snake.”

I crumbled in bed, remembering the dream that was so beautiful it was cruel. Edward was just like he always was, not the monster of reality. A sob escaped me and I hid my face in my hands, feeling the flush radiate through me.

“Honey,” Esme was beside me now, rubbing my back lovingly. “Would you like to talk about it?”

Without removing my hands, I shook my head desperately.

“Esme,” Rosalie said as her firm voice caught my attention, forcing my stomach to tighten at the request that followed.. “Could you give Bella and me a minute?”

As I lowered my hands, I saw Esme throw Rose a wary glare before rising from the bed and gliding gracefully out of the room. I rested my hands in my lap and took a deep breath before locking eyes with my sister-in-law.

The serious expression on her face had not waned or lessened in any way, which made my stomach do flip flops. I swallowed heavily and fidgeted nervously as she stared at me in uncomfortable silence. I was beginning to think about saying something when Rosalie sighed deeply.

“Bella.” She spoke in strained calmness and crossed her arms again. “Are you having doubts?”

“Doubts?” I shook my head, not understanding what she meant.

“Are you reconsidering your plan?” she asked and sat down on the bed, her brow heavily furrowed. “Do you believe you can go through with it?”

I opened my mouth to demand that I strongly believed everything I had set into motion, yet I couldn’t find any words. I reclined back in silence and my mind poured over the reasons I wanted to kill Edward—none of them seemed adequate anymore.

“Hmm,” Rosalie moved closer to me. “Why don’t you tell me what your dream was about, Bella?”

My arms wrapped around my waist while I remembered the beautiful and terrible dream. “I don’t know if I can, Rose.”

She leaned in, a softer expression on her face now, and took my hand gently. “Try.”

With a slow nod, I began to recount the events of my dream, not missing any detail. Rose sat motionless, except for an occasional nod, and listened patiently while I sobbed through my encounter with the dream world. When I was finished, she sighed and shook her head.

“Bella.” She didn’t look at me. “You shouldn’t let your dreams dictate your decisions. This was merely a combination of anxiety and your desire for everything to be different.”

I scoffed as I listened to her, thinking back to Romeo and Juliet. I talk of dreams, which are the children of an idle brain, but begot of nothing but thin fantasy.

“Mercutio sure had it right,” I muttered and sighed heavily before looking up at Rose. “I just don’t know if I can go through with this, Rosalie.”

Her nostrils flared and she pursed her lips angrily. “Bella,” she said venomously between her teeth. “We have all committed to this. I thought Esme would be the first to crack, but not you.” She turned and stared out the window and sighed. “I won’t lie and say I’m completely sure we can do this, but Bella,” she said as she turned back to me, desperation in her eyes, “we can’t sit by and do nothing.”

“I know.” I hung my head. “But what if Edward was thinking in my best interest?”

“Will you listen to yourself?” Rosalie gripped both sides of her hair and snarled angrily. “You’re trying to justify what he did to all of us!”

“No, I’m not,” I insisted as I glared at her. “I’m just remembering—“

“Remembering?” Rosalie hissed and leaned forward, seizing the blanket covering me. In one swift motion, she yanked the covers off me, revealing my frail body, shielded by a dainty nightgown. Before I could lodge a protest, she brought her hand on my stitches, forcing a scream from me. “Remember this?”

The door swung open and Esme, followed by two other women, flew into the room and instantly had her hands around Rosalie’s midsection. My blonde sister-in-law did not contest their restraint, but merely stared at me with a frozen look of anger.

“Rosalie Hale!” Esme shrieked as I crumbled on the bed. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Refreshing Bella’s memory,” Rosalie muttered and pushed past her mother. When she was beside the doorway she paused and turned over her right shoulder. “Don’t think you were the only one injured, Bella.”

As she disappeared, a sharp sob cut me like a knife through butter, and I emotionally collapsed. I couldn’t hold the raging tears from streaming down my face, so I didn’t try to. A cold hand touched my back and I instantly snapped my head up, looking to see the source of my comfort.

Esme stood over me, staring at me with the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen. That’s when I remembered that she knew my loss. True, her baby died after he had been born, but he had died all the same. Now, my circumstances and pain were probably uprooting deep emotions, long forgotten.

Not wanting to cause her anymore agony, I cringed away from her touch and tucked my face into my knees, wincing at the pain from my stomach, and sighed.

“Esme,” I whispered in between sobs. “Please, leave me.”

She exhaled heavily but her hand left my back quickly and, as the door opened, she stopped. “I’ll be downstairs if you need anything, Bella,” she said and I looked up to meet her haunted smile. “You’re not alone in this.”

The door closed and my body fell back on the bed, feeling the heavy weight of my choices crashing down on me. What was wrong with me? Did I really expect that I could kill Edward? Despite everything—all my anger, rage, and pain—I obviously still loved him. I rested my hand on my stomach and thought back to the dream.

Closing my eyes, I remembered Edward’s touch and the familiar electricity that flowed from the action. The fluttering in my stomach felt so real, like I was actually standing there with him. A weak smile spread across my face as I recalled the perfection of his face and the musical masterpiece that was his voice. He was my Edward; he was my husband.

My shoulders slumped and I glanced around the massive room. What am I doing? I was foolish to think that I should—or could—harm the man I love. I sighed heavily as I realized what I had to do. First, I had to get my strength back, but after that would be a much harder task. A lump formed in my throat and I gulped heavily as I thought about how I was going to tell Rosalie.

I wondered if she and Emmett would return with me to Forks or stay with the Denalis. Before I could think of it anymore, I yawned loudly and lowered my eyelids, sending myself to my dreams.