Vengeance

Chapter Thirty Two

Chapter 32

Suffocation.

Little by little, the days were starting to grow brighter.  I could stand to be in the same room as Edward for longer than a few minutes, my human blood diet had ceased, and I had been able to venture out of the house into civilization.  There were a few occasions when I was even able to converse with the locals without having to hold my breath.

“You’re doing wonderful, love,” Edward whispered after I had asked a passerby for directions to the main road.  I felt his arm tighten around my waist, and I fought the urge to shirk his affection. “Would you like to stay a little longer, or are you ready to head home?”

I was thoughtful for a few moments before answering, “I think I saw a bookstore around the corner.”

“All right,” Edward answered with a broad smile, and we crossed the street.

It wasn’t that I was exactly enjoying myself—surrounded by delicious smelling humans was very stressful on my control, especially on such a hot day—but I wanted to keep as much distance as possible between the mansion and myself.  Despite Edward and I getting a bit better, there was still a shadow that darkened my life—one that I had not anticipated. 

In the past month, Emily’s longing for Jacob, her deceased soul mate, had increased and caused her to beg for him almost every day, and it didn’t end there. Whenever Edward or I told her he wasn’t coming back, she would grip our faces tightly, unleashing her gift against us.  Because of her remarkable ability, I had been given a front row seat to her grief and loneliness.  After enduring only a few seconds of this, I had fallen apart.

The weight of what I had done had finally hit me, and I found my irritation and rage had converted to remorse and pain.  Even now, as Edward and I navigated through the streets, despite the slight smile on my face, a painful wound was pulsating in my chest. Regardless of the knowledge that Jacob had tried to kill Emily, I mourned him.

“Bella?” I didn’t realize Edward was speaking until he tugged lightly on my hand, causing me to turn in his direction. His brow indented slightly, concerned. “Is everything all right? You’ve been somewhat pensive for a while now.”

“Yeah,” I sighed and took a deep breath in an attempt to clear my head. “I was just thinking about…stuff.”

“Anything in particular?” His raised eyebrows told me that I had piqued his curiosity.

I exhaled heavily and debated internally with myself about whether I should tell Edward what was on my mind. Whenever we discussed Jacob and Emily, it always ended with Edward being hurled through a wall.  While that would have been fine at the house, we were in public and had to watch what we did and said.  So, with a heavy heart, I looked at Edward and shook my head.

We spent an additional two hours in town before my thirst became a problem. I was very relieved when Edward suggested we hunt the moment we arrived at the mansion. In fact, as soon as we pulled up into the grassy path, I wasted no time in throwing the car door open and dashing into the woods.  A few minutes later, I had drained three deer and was relaxing in the branches of a willow tree when Edward found me.

“Feel better?” He looked up at me with an amused expression, and I couldn’t help but shrug. “Come on, love—Emmett and Rose need their alone time.”

I nodded, understanding that Rosalie and Emmett had been watching Emily all day, and trailed behind Edward as he led me back to the main house. Once there, I found that Emmett was the only one in the house; Rose had vacated moments before we arrived. After exchanging a few pleasantries, my large brother-in-law headed back to his own dwelling.