Taiven Parmiga

Chapter 35: Decisions

For the next few days, I can’t stop thinking about the call and the offer to act in the Australian movie. Evan and I just hang around at the house while I try to find a good time to bring it up.

What will his reaction be? Will he be excited for me or want me to stay? Could he go with me? Would he even want to? I'm pretty sure has other films he’s wanting to work on in America. There’s no way he would be able to come with me.

A week after I get the call, Ev and I have just finished cleaning up after dinner and are sat on the couch watching Chopped on the TV when I click it off with the remote and turn towards him. I’m sitting criss-crossed on one end and he sits up confused leaning against some throw pillows across from me on the other end.

“I need to talk to you about something.” I say, already getting really nervous.

“Oh no. What is it? Did I do something wrong?” he says getting obviously worried.

“No, no!” I say with my eyes wide. “You didn’t do anything. I promise. I just need to tell you about a phone call I got a week ago.” I say, starting to fumble with my fingers in my lap.

“Well, what is it?” he says, relieved he didn’t do something to upset me.

“I got an offer to star in a new movie.” I say calmly not looking up at him.

“Are you serious? That’s awesome! Tai, you have to do it! It would be incredible for you and your career.” He says shaking my knees and smiling excitedly. “Wait.” He stops and goes still. “You look like it’s bad news…What is it?” he asks, with some fear in his voice.

I pause for a long time before speaking quietly. “It’s in Australia.”

After I tell him, the room is silent for a long time. It feels like ages before he speaks.

“Well…um…It’s a huge deal. It could be really good for you…but-“

“But I don’t want to leave and be away from you for that long.” I say scooting closer and putting both of his hands in mine. “You could come with me, you know. It could be fun. We could get a crappy apartment, do some touring, and then come back home when filming is all done.” I say, trying to stay positive and hoping he doesn’t think about his filming in America. But I can tell it didn’t work when he looks up with sadness in his eyes.

“Tai, you know I can’t. I have filming here. I can’t put all my dreams on hold.”

“But you want me to?” I say, getting a little angry at his response. Does he really expect me to throw away this amazing opportunity just because he can’t come with me?

“No, no, that’s not it. It’s just…you can get filming opportunities here. You know, closer to home. So you don’t have to leave me. I don’t want you to leave me.” He says putting his hand on the side of my face.

“Then come with me.” I say as convincingly as I can. “I can talk to the director and see if you can get a part in the movie too, even if it’s a small one. Anything so we can stay together.” I say, feeling tears start to come to my eyes, already knowing what his response will be.

“I want to! You have no idea how much I want to. But I can’t just leave. My agent already has at least 3 different filming projects for me here for the next year planned. I can’t just up and leave.” he says, looking sadder by the minute.

“What?” I say standing up. “When were you gonna tell me you already had 3 projects planned? Were you just gonna wait around because you expected me to stay here?” I say getting louder than before.

“Whoa. Hold on. You didn’t tell me you had a project planned in Australia for a whole week. AUSTRALIA!” he says standing up now too.

“It’s not the same! You already agreed to do those films. I haven’t said yes yet!” I say getting angrier with every response he gives me.

“Oh come on. You knew from the moment you got that call you were gonna say yes. Don’t pretend you were gonna let me have any input whatsoever.” He says scowling at me.

“That is NOT true! I waited to talk to you about it! You know why? Because I love you. And I care about you and what you think is best for me and for us…But maybe I was wrong.” I say getting quieter as I finish the statement.

“That’s what I’m doing! I’m not trying to kill your dreams, Taissa. I just don’t want you to leave. By telling you that I don’t want you to go, I’m not doing what’s best for me. I’m doing what’s best for US.”

“Trying to control me and make the decisions that make YOU happy are NOT what’s best for US. If I’m not allowed to put your dreams on hold, you are sure as HELL are not allowed to put MINE on hold, just so you can keep me around because you don’t want to come with me. You don’t get to make that decision for me or keep me from going after this amazing opportunity just because it's further away than the filming you're doing."

“So what are you gonna say, huh? When you call them back, what are you gonna tell them? Are you gonna say yes?” He asks, almost scaring me with how angry he’s acting. But I know him well enough to know he’s hurting behind all the anger.

“Maybe I will.” I say a bit quieter looking deep into his eyes. I instantly see the anger disappear replaced with sadness. But he turns away too soon before saying the words that cut deep into me and cause me more pain than I’ve felt in a long time.

“Maybe you should.”
He grabs his coat and keys as he storms out slamming the front door behind him. As I stand there, tears streaming down my face, I hear his car engine start up and the tires screech as he rushes down the street and far away.

AN:
Holy Moly it's been ages! I'm so sorry for it taking so long. BUT THE BOOK IS ALMOST DONE NOW! I'm so excited for the ending (even though I'm not completely sure how it's gonna go yet). I hope you enjoy whatever I decide to do. As always, thanks for reading. And you know the drill by now. Tap that star and drop a comment if you have anything to say. Don't be shy!

-Aly