To Fix What We Broke

Morning

AN: I update this on fanfiction.net and archiveofourown more frequently. It's titled "To Fix What We Broke" on there. My username is the same for both as my wattpad.

After returning from his office the previous night, he hadn't gotten any sleep. None of them had. They were all too afraid to fall asleep thinking that they might wake up to a dead Kuroko. Instead they had sat around and on the bed drinking tea and watching Kuroko sleep while talking in quiet whispers until dawn had approached. Then Midorima, Kise, and Aomine had reluctantly left for school upon Akashi's insistence. Akashi had remained in the bed with Kuroko watching the small boys frame continue to shake. It was an hour after the others had left when Kuroko's dull blue eyes stared up at Akashi's fiery red ones.

"Good morning Tetsuya."

Kuroko didn't respond. Akashi got up, stretched his stiff limbs, and wandered towards a dresser on the other side of the room.

"I'm getting you some clothes to change into. I'll help you put them on okay. Go ahead and remove what you have on."

Kuroko still didn't respond and he didn't move. He just stared without really seeing anything. Akashi brought the clothes over to the bed and gently began removing Kuroko's clothes. Kuroko didn't protest. Akashi didn't want to see. He didn't want to see what Tetsuya, what his Tetsuya, had become. Unfortunately, Kuroko showed no signs of dressing himself so Akashi had no choice. As the shirt was removed, he noticed every rib that stood out painfully defined on the small boys torso. Some scars from cutting were scattered about, although most were on his arms. Sliding off Kuroko's pants revealed hipbones jutting out with red lines. Legs that used to have a good bit of muscle on them had withered to little more than skin and bone, much like the rest of the malnourished body. Akashi wanted to be sick and had to swallow the bile that rose in the back of his throat. Quickly he put Kuroko's new set of clothes on.

"A....Akashi.....kun" Akashi was startled out of his thoughts. A small cold hand was brushing his cheek and he realized he had been crying. Embarrassed, he turned away and went into the bathroom to change his own clothes. Kuroko looked after him confused but didn't say anything more.

When Akashi returned, Kuroko was sitting on the bed with his knees pulled to his chest and a distant look on his face.

"Come with me Tetsuya." Akashi ordered. He held out his arm and let Kuroko cling to it as he tried to steady his legs. They shook, weak, and threatened to give out, but they didn't. Grimacing after bearing witness to Kuroko's struggle, Akashi slowly led the frail boy out of the room. Kuroko clung to his arm weakly, but with a certain desperation.

"W...where are we going?"

"The dining room. Breakfast should be waiting." Akashi sighed when he felt the smaller boy stop. Looking at Kuroko, he noted the fear in his eyes. "You are going to eat Tetsuya." Tears began to well up in the blue eyes as the smaller boy gripped Akashi's arm tighter in terror. Akashi ignored it and all but dragged the protesting blue haired boy into a large dining room. He peeled Kuroko's grip from his arm and set him down in one of the chairs before sitting down in his own.

It was a heart breaking sight. Kuroko pulled his knees to his chest, trembling with wide eyes. Tears were spilling from blue eyes filled with terror as if he was watching someone beat his puppy to death, not looking at a bowl of porridge. How could food be that terrifying? Akashi looked away and focused on his own food hoping that maybe Kuroko would follow his example if he just started eating.

Unfortunately, when he looked back at Kuroko a few minutes later, not much had changed. Kuroko was still staring at the porridge with wide eyes akin to that of a frightened animal. A very starved and tired looking frightened animal, Akashi corrected himself.

"Tetsuya.." He tried to fight his annoyance from invading his voice. "We aren't leaving this table until you eat something."

Kuroko's face seemed to become a shade paler, if that was actually possible, but made no attempt to touch the food. Kuroko knew Akashi was serious. Both of them were stubborn though. It was a test to see who could hold out the longest.

Two hours later, the two boys were still sitting at the table. Every inch of Kuroko's body seemed to be screaming from stiffness and soreness, as his position wasn't very comfortable and his energy was depleting far too quickly. His mental stubbornness could likely rival Akashi's easily and perhaps even win, but his physical state was too far weakened to be any sort of a match.

"Why?" Kuroko's voice was barely a whisper. It was tinted with frustration, but otherwise bland.

"Hmm?"

"Why do you care?"

Akashi stared at the other boy thoughtfully, trying to decide how to respond. Kuroko continued, raising his voice, before Akashi had made a decision.

"WHY DO YOU CARE!? I'M WORTHLESS....I'm nothing...I failed...I need to disappear..just...just let me disappear.....JUST LET ME DIE!! Please..." Kuroko lowered his head onto his knees, banging it repetitively against his knee cap, and was crying again, digging his nails into the skin of his upper arms. Akashi could only stare, shocked at the outburst, while Kuroko continues to ramble. "Let me die...please.....please....please...let me die...let me disappear...please. You don't need me anymore anyway.....you never did...no one did...because....because I am nothing..."

Finally, Akashi snapped out of it. Moving from his chair to stand beside Kuroko, he lifted a spoonful of porridge to his own mouth, set the spoon back down, jerked Kuroko's head up to face him, leaned down, and settled into a kiss. Before Kuroko could push away or close his mouth, Akashi forced the food from his own mouth into the smaller boys mouth and kept their lips pressed together until Kuroko swallowed. He pulled away and Kuroko just stared at him with the same wide eyes as before, but this time they were filled with confusion.

"I won't let you die Tetsuya. I absolutely refuse. You are mine."

Neither moved. Kuroko's face was drowning in another wave of tears, but they were silent. A moment of awkwardness dragged on until Akashi pulled Kuroko close, rubbing soothing circles onto his back.

"Please....just eat a few bites..." The two had been sitting there for several minutes and Kuroko's tears seemed to be lessening so he decided to try again. He felt Kuroko stiffen and shake his head. At this point, Akashi was about to lose his composure which wouldn't help the situation. "Fine, but don't you dare try to get rid of what I already gave you." He blushed a bit thankful the Kuroko couldn't see his face. He was even more thankful when he felt Kuroko nod ever so slightly in agreement. One bite was hardly enough to keep Tetsuya alive, but it was a start if he was willing to keep it down. According to the doctor, he probably hadn't kept anything down in weeks. So even one small spoonful, as small and seemingly insignificant as it was, felt like an accomplishment. Baby steps, Akashi reminded himself, baby steps.

"Lets get you cleaned up in the bath eh? Then you can rest some more okay?" A bath seemed like a good idea, although he was a bit nervous knowing he would have to help the blue haired boy bathe. Without waiting for Kuroko's answer, Akashi picked him up gently and carried him into the bathroom attached to the large bedroom they had slept in the night before.

It was a somewhat difficult task to bathe Kuroko, and not just because of the awkwardness. Kuroko was too tired from the long ordeal previously to hold himself up very long and Akashi was constantly afraid of scrubbing to hard or using too much force. Due to his condition, Kuroko bruised easier than normal and Akashi didn't want to harm him. Akashi also found he wasn't very good other peoples hair. Despite his best efforts, the soap ran into Kurokos eyes multiple times.

Somehow, Kuroko's eyes survived and Akashi dressed him into warm clothing before carrying him to the bed. Once Kuroko was on the bed in a comfortable position, Akashi tucked him under the blankets. Then, grabbing a book from the side table, he settled in next to Kuroko to wait out the rest of the afternoon.

'This is nice' Akashi thought, stealing a peek at the blue haired boy who had almost instantly fallen asleep. Akashi smiled and stroked the blue hair. Things felt peaceful. His heart ached though when he thought back to one of the conversations he had with Dr. Furuori, because although Akashi was typically strong and composed and seemed to know nothing of fear, Akashi was terrified. If he couldn't get Tetsuya to change....it would only be a matter of months, if even, before their phantom player became a true ghost.