Chapter Eighteen
I'm not mean. I swear. Mean has never been my thing. It's just, blocking people out was always so easy for me and it was my way of doing things. So, when Adam practically came out and said he had feelings for me, my first resort was to get rid of him.
I didn't do this with Justin and I have no idea why. It would've been easier for me in the end, but yet again, it wouldn't have, because I'd still be sitting in my room, crying over the fact I hadn't gotten to know him better.
Yet, I'd still do nothing about it with the people I had left in my life.
Quickly, I text Danny, using the number he gave me last night.
Me: hey lots of drama with adam everything is just so screwd up right now and ur like the only guy I can talk 2 who wont hit on me
Danny replies quickly, as if he was just waiting for me to text him.
Danny: tell me bout it
So, I just pour myself out to him through text. I hate texting my feelings, but right now, I didn't care about my values. I was just pissed off and had to let it out, one way or another.
I start with how mad I am at Justin for just leaving like that and how mad I am at him for leaving me to pick up the pieces and how mad I am at Adam for hitting on me so early and how mad I am at...well, just the world.
When I'm done, I click send roughly.
He replies after about two minutes.
Danny: well thats a lot of crap justin really sounds like a sucky guy and he doesnt deserve u
I smile a bit at that and shake my head, sighing a bit. I look up at my ceiling as if the answers had been painted there and I had never noticed them before.
Not so surprisingly, nothing's there to help me.
Me: ik and I h8 this so much I just needed some1 to talk to...
Danny: y not one of ur girlfriends???
Me: haha bcuz u seem like the only cool person to talk to right now
Danny: well thank u dahling
Me: ur totally welcome dahling
Danny: god ur gay
I laugh a little at Danny's texts and sigh, looking over at myself in my hanging mirror.
It was the same me, but it seemed different. I had the same usual natural-looking-red-hair-that-wasn't-really-natural look and the same big green eyes that looked blue in certain lighting. I had the same nose and light freckles and pale skin, but something was different.
Maybe it was the new sadness in my eyes or the way I hadn't done my makeup.
Anyways, I didn't like it, but I wouldn't really do anything about it.
I stare at my phone, mindlessly zoning out. Suddenly, an idea enters my mind. I look up at the ceiling and smile, the answers finally seeming clear.
I could prevent this from happening again. I could prevent this whole suicide shit with just a few words. Nobody deserved it and they needed to know that. They needed to know that being another Justin Blake and just running away from your problems isn't the answer. It's weak and it just hurts everyone around you.
Quickly, I get on my laptop, logging into my IM. My IM name was really lame (angelxoxo), but that didn't really matter.
I didn't have to start immediately at my school. I could just start with the people announcing their ideas of suicide through IM and I could stop them.
With just a few words.
And, of course, I would start at school tomorrow.
YOU ARE READING
Among The Stars
Dla nastolatków*First book* Do you ever wonder what would happen if you died? It doesn't even have to be suicide. What if you just didn't wake up one night? Firstly, what would happen to you? What if there isn't a God and everything left is just darkness. Or maybe...
