The Searching Secret

Chapter 20

The next few days were all very similar. We would spend the day searching all over Miami for Evan. Then, during the evenings, we would end up just spending time together. We would watch movies, play games, or walk on the beach. I knew I wasn't optimizing our time searching, but one could only search so long and come up empty.

When Friday evening came a long, I couldn't help but sigh, as I stared out my open patio door. Another day was over and we were as close to finding Evan as when we first started. I couldn't stop myself from thinking maybe I wasn't suppose to find him. Maybe, I was just supposed to go home with Jay. Whenever I thought about Jay, I couldn't stop my hand from reaching for the necklace that was now always around my neck. This week had been so wonderful. Maybe I should just let go.

My thoughts were interrupted by Jay's voice, along with his feeling of guilt, coming from his open door. Without thinking I inched closer so I could hear what he was saying. "... everything is fine." There was a pause and then Jay spoke again. "No, mom, I'm not taking her to your favorite restaurant." Another pause, as I moved so I could see in his room. "Because I'm just not. Okay?"

I didn't understand. Jay was on his phone, with his back to me, talking to his mom, of all people. That couldn't be what he was feeling guilty about. I was about to walk back to my room when he voice came again. "Yes, mom, the rooms are perfect. Thanks for calling the hotel for me."

This made me freeze in my tracks. Did his mom book our hotel rooms? Did she know where Jay was? Did she know I was with him?

Jay was finishing up his conversation, so I turned around and waited in the doorway, my arms crossed over my chest. There was no way I was going to pretend I didn't hear any of that. "I love you too, mom." As he started to turn around he added, "Yes, I'll make sure to pass your love to Riley." The moment he said my name was when his eyes landed on me and widened. Many emotions exploded from him, as he stared at me. He was scared, nervous, and worried about how much of the conversation I heard. He was mad at me for sneaking up on him and of course, he was madly in love with me.

"I gotta go," Jay finally said, and hung up the phone before she had a chance to respond. "Riley." He raised his hands in slight surrender. "It's not what you think."

"Oh really?" I asked, unmoving. "So that wasn't your mom?"

"No. It was," he answered, as he hesitantly took a step towards me. "She sends her love."

I smiled shortly. "That's sweet. I've always loved your mom. She is always so sweet to me."

Jay started to relax a bit. "That's my mom," he replied, hopeful that would be the end of the conversation.

I nodded and Jay smiled before turning around. However, my words stopped him mid step. "I just only wish I could have spoken to her."

Jay turned back to face me and eyed me suspiciously. "Why?" he asked, confusion radiating from him.

"You know, to thank her for everything she has done."

Jay nodded, but was suspicious about my sudden urge to thank his mom.

"Oh, and so I can tell her how much of a backstabbing jerk her son truly is!" I yelled, as I pushed past him.

"Riley, it's not what you think," Jay said again, as he turned to face me.

"Then why don't you explain it to me, Jay? Why don't you tell me what is going on?" I snapped. When Jay didn't speak, I lost it. "Tell me, Jay! Did your mom book these rooms? Does she know where we are!? Did you tell her!?"

"Yes, Riley." Jay finally sighed, as he walked towards me. "Yes, I told her, and asked her to book the room."

"How could you!" I glared.

"How could I? Really, Riley, She's my mom. I couldn't let her worry about me," he explained

My eyes widened as I felt more guilt, but then narrowed back into a glare. "What about my mom?" When Jay avoided looking at me I had my answer. "Does my mom know where I am?! Answer me Jay! Does she know?!"

When Jay's eyes finally met mine, he looked like a scolded puppy. "She knows you're with me. That's it. She knows your safe with me," he said, and dropped his gaze to the floor again.

"Because I'm always safe with you." Jay glanced up at me unsure how to take my response, but I was pissed. "Safe Jay. You know maybe that's the problem. You're too safe!"

"Riley," Jay started to defend himself.

"No, Jay! You're always wondering why I don't just let go and be with you. Well, maybe that's it! Maybe I don't want safe!!" I screamed.

Jay froze where he was, his saddened face now turned into a glare. My eyes dropped, instantly regretting what I said. I took the one thing that bothered Jay the most and used it to hurt him. The worst part was feeling the hurt and anger that I caused. I watched as his fist clenched by his side, and anger started to take over the hurt. I knew what I said wasn't fair. I knew I didn't mean it and wished I hadn't said it at all.

"Jay, I didn't mean-"

"No!" Jay snapped, anger pulsing through him. "It's exactly what you meant!"

"Jay, please." I tried again, without success.

"No, Riley. You don't want safe, fine!" Jay said, as he herded me to the door. "Go get changed. We are going out!" Then he closed his patio door and curtain, leaving me standing there in complete shock.

A/N Sorry everyone for not posting for so long! I don't mean to wait this long until I posted again, but things have been pretty crazy lately. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and the ones that will follow! (PS comments help me to post!)