The Searching Secret

Chapter 28

Jay pulled slightly away from me. A smile formed where my lips just were, and I couldn't help but place them back on his. He chuckled softly, as he pulled away again. "Riley, I-"

"I know." I said, cutting him off. I didn't want to talk, because talking required thinking, and I am not sure I was ready to think about the choice I just made. I moved my lips towards his again, but again he pulled away.

When he saw my pout he laughed again. "As much as I love kissing you, and God knows how long I've been waiting to. I mean really there were some many times over this past week, ha over the past years that I've wanted to-"

"Then, why aren't you?" I asked, cutting him off once again.

He laughed, again pulling away from me. "While first, because we are in a very public place. And second, because as happy as I am kissing you," he paused to give me a quick peck on the lips. "I couldn't be happier just sitting here watching the waves with you."

I smiled sweetly at him and moved from his lap, so that I was now seated beside him in the sand. "Okay," I said softly, as I rested my head on his shoulder, and he wrapped his arm around me.

After watching the waves crash for a while, I couldn't stop the thoughts from entering my mind. I sighed and looked up at Jay, biting my lower lip softly. Jay laughed. "How about we just head back to the hotel?" he asked.

"Okay!" I said, standing up in a flash. This of course earned me another laugh from Jay as he joined me.

"Oh, Ri, I am so in love with you," he said, as he pulled me close and kissed the top of my head.

"I know," I mumbled.

--

I woke up the next morning with a groan. My head was pounding and I hated myself for once again drinking way more then I should. "I need to stay away from alcohol," I mumbled to myself, as I rolled over. I was just about ready to start searching for something to take this pain away, when a noise beside me made me freeze. I wasn't alone.

I took a deep breath and slowly turned. Relief flooded over me when I saw Jay lying beside me . . . without a shirt on. . . crap! Instantly, panic replaced my relief. Why was he in bed with me, without a shirt covering his bare chest? Panic started to grow more as my mind questioned what else might be bare under the blankets. Without giving my mind anymore time to wonder I took a quick peek under the blanket and breathed a huge sigh of relief. The lower half of his body was nicely covered with a pair of basketball shorts.

Slowly memories from last night drifted into my head, and another groan escaped my lips. I needed some air; I needed to think, and I couldn't do it in this, all of a sudden, stuffy room. As quickly and as quietly as I could, I slipped out of the bed. Upon seeing that I was only wearing a t-shirt and underwear, I hastily put on the closest pair of shorts and rushed out the back door. I didn't stop moving until my feet touched damp sand.

Thoughts were swarming in my head like mosquitoes on a warm summer evening. Did I really want this? Was the thought I just couldn't escape. Did I really want Jay? Was this truly the path I wanted to take? Should I be happy about everything that happened last night? Or regret it?? The weight of this confusion caused me to sit down.

My thoughts went to Sam and this crazy mission I sent myself on. Those first few weeks of searching, alone, were miserable. Yet, this time with Jay has been remarkable. I couldn't stop a smile from growing on my face as I thought about all the things we have done together, and instinctively my hand traveled to the heart around my neck.. Being with Jay made me forget everything that happened to me over the last year. He made me smile when I never imagined I would again and I didn't want it to end.

So, instead of trying to hold back the smile that Jay gave me, I let it grow. I took a deep breath and looked out at the amazing view in front of me, and knew I had made my decision. There was no going back to how things were before, and for once I was excited to let go of the past and see what is waiting for me ahead. I stood up and looked one last time at the ocean, and soaked in the early morning sun. It's time for me to start living again.

Suddenly, I froze as my heart pounded in my chest. I felt him; he was nervous. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to turn around and face him. He stood there for a moment as his nerves grew, finally he spoke, "I heard you've been looking for me, Love."

A/N Things are about to get interesting and confusing for Riley. Want another chapter? Leave a comment!