I want to die before you,
but im terrified of death.
I cant go on living anymore,
but im afraid of death.
Please don't make me bury you.
I'm a selfish man,
I will put that pain on you.
God, take this all away,
but I'm petrified.
I only live once,
but what's the point?
I should've never been born.
The lives around me remain scarred,
what if I was unborn?
The scars heal,
the pain recedes,
tear ducts dry.
Why?
Why should I keep on living?
Their points are pointless,
their hope is hopeless,
their prayers are unanswered,
and their will turns to doubt.
Life leaves me shaking,
broken,
but death leaves me stricken.
Life is a war,
differentiating between which is worse.
Some fail,
some prevail.
Is death an empty void?
Is there a heaven?
Is there a hell?
Is it worse than this life?
"Embrace the gift of life",
there is no pleasure in this blessing,
only pain in this curse.
This blessing is void,
a king ruling an empty kingdom.
Yet death comes to conquer,
I can only flee.
So I raise my army of demons,
raise my army of scars,
I wage war with life,
with death breathing down my neck.
Don't be gone,
I need you.
Life is winning,
your my final defense.
Don't die,
don't leave,
I can't grieve.
In your grave, I'll lay,
your coffin, I'll steal.
I don't want salvation,
I want damnation,
I deserve to suffer;
Have you ever begged God for death?
I can't live without you,
I'll die before you,
I pray for death,
but I'm afraid of death.
Please kill me,
please save me,
please kill me,
please save me.
Please.
YOU ARE READING
Poems of a Suicidal Memory
PoezjaI took all of my poems and compiled them into one big thing. Comments and constructive criticism are/is much appreciated. I will add to this as I write more, therefore there will be no set time for when I will update. Just read, enjoy, and support m...