Disremembered (Fourtris story)

Chapter 14: Smothered In Kindness

Chapter 14: Smothered In Kindness

*Tris POV*

I am in my own personal hell. I am being smothered with kindness and positivity, they may be worse than the Amity people. Yet they will not give me what I really want. To get out of here. They have asked me to have patience. They are concerned I am not strong enough to leave, they want to ensure I have regained my strength and that I will not reinjure my wounds. My room is quite large – and there is an extensive rotation of therapies I do almost every day. The issue is that all the specialist come to my room to perform to work with me. I have never been allowed to leave my room. I do feel myself getting stronger every day. I have also put a big smile on my face and shown the highest gratitude that their "testing" in fact saved my life. Had they not wanted to run tests (on my lifeless body) then I would have indeed died that day. I need to convince them that they can let me return to my life, and I will remain a willing participant.

I beg them for an update on Tobias, Caleb, my friends. They just assure me that they are all fine. One evening late at night the kind nurse, I have since found out her name is Gabriela, slips in when no one is around. She pulls a flashlight out of her pocket, and puts her finger to her lips, motioning for me to remain quiet.

She pulls a paper printout out of the pocket of her scrubs. I furrow my brows, anxious to see what she needs to show me. With her back to the door, while blocking the window view with her body if someone were to walk in, she unfolds the paper and points the flashlight to it. I immediately see it is a print out of a photo – I slowly release the breath I had been holding. My eyes immediately search out Tobias. He is seated next to Zeke, turned to him and smiling. I then look at each face: Caleb, Cara, Christina, Amar, even Zeke is in the photo. It is then that I smile to myself and I taste my salty tears on my lips. I had not even realized I had been crying. They are all alive. They are all well. They are all whole. We made it. We really did.

In that moment, I know more than ever – I must get back to him. And soon. I can feel it.

After Gabriela folds the paper and places it back into her pocket, apologizing that she could not leave it with me – she says goodbye for the night, her shift having ended. She had decided to not ask permission to show me this photo. I would never want her to get into trouble, and just knowing they are ok with enough for now. I told her how grateful I am.

Every night before I fall to sleep thinking about Tobias, which leads to often dreaming of him. I miss him dearly and I can't wait to be together again. But that would have to wait for now.

I lay quietly in my bed for what feels like hours. When I am sure that everything is quiet, and what I assume can only be the very early hours of the morning, I slip out of my bed. I tie my robe around me and slip on sneakers. I need to start investigating how to get out of here. I calmly crack my door open, and peer into the hallway. Complete silence, even the nurses' station remains empty at this time. I slide out and begin walking down the hall. I quickly take in my surroundings, the hallways, the doors to stairs, I notice there are cameras situated in corners to capture everything. And then I am discovered, "Ms. Prior! Why are you not in your room??"

"Oh thank goodness! I was calling for help from my room and no answered, and then the hallway was empty as well. Could you find a nurse for me? I am not feeling well, and I want to make sure my vitals are ok. I even feel a little dizzy and weak. I hope I am not getting sick..." I say as I gently lean on a sidewall to gently support myself.

"Of course, but Ms. Prior, in the future you can't just leave your room. We would not want something to happen to you. Come with me, I will escort you back to your room..." the young guard offers me his arm. I smile at him appreciatively (I may have even batted my eyelashes at him) while holding on to him in order to "steady" myself. As we walk back to my area, I instinctively look up into the hallway camera that directly points to the door of my room. I turn for one last look as I am gently ushered back into my room.

As I had hoped, the young guard did not report finding me in the hallway. Instead he called for medical support and implied I had called out for help from my room. The next day is uneventful, I do feel myself getting stronger every day. I made the decision not to attempt anything until the following night, I do not want to push my luck.

As I lay in bed and wait for sleep to take me, I think of him. His intense eyes, and the way they shine when they when he looks at me. The way it feels to be wrapped in his arms. The way it feels to push my fingers into his hair while drawing his lips to mine. And then I am asleep.

What feels like hours later, I wake to someone gently but persistently shaking my shoulder. I open my eyes, the darkness of my room makes it hard to see who is touching me. But I immediately know it is not one of the female nurses. The next moment I am startled and I quickly sit up on my bed and knock the person's hand away from my shoulder. I am ready to defend myself if needed.

And then I hear his voice. "Tris? Beatrice Prior?"

It is Tobias.