Disremembered (Fourtris story)

Chapter: 24 Are You Into Her?

Chapter: 24 Are You Into Her?

*Four POV*

As soon as Tris, and the others are completely out of the conference room and down the hall, I release air I had been holding in. I keep hurting her, even though I am trying not to. I feel like I am trapped in a lose–lose situation. With no way out.

And then Zeke's smug voice interrupts my thoughts. "So, is it time for us to have that talk you mentioned yet?" He sits down across the table from me and leans back in his chair. Smiling at me, like some kind of asshole.

I am instantly reminded of his hands all over Tris, and his constant whispering sweet nothings into her ear. He's even kissed her!!!! Ok, it was a kiss on the forehead, but still. He did kiss her!!!!

"Have you always been so touchy-feely with Tris? In front of me, I mean even before I lost my memories? Or are you making a move on her now?! I will not allow you to take advantage of her! Not now, not ever." I blurt out. I feel the heat in my face rising.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I cringe. I am acting like a jealous little girl. The bastard has the nerve to raise his eyebrows while holding his same smile. Zeke still doesn't say anything to me.

"You know what, forget it! This is obviously some kind of joke to you," I snap at him. I control the desire I have to jump over the table and wipe that smug look off his face.

"Oh I promise you Tobias, this is not a joke to me. Not at all." Zeke assures me with a composed smile on his face. I assume he is admitting he is serious about getting with Tris, and that it is going to make me feel better. I feel as though someone has kicked me in the stomach.

"Are you into her?" I ask unsmiling.

"Are you?" Zeke asks while scratching his chin. I can see now that he is intently studying me.

"I asked you first." I spit out. I can feel my chest tightening as I wait for his response.

And then Zeke literally bursts out laughing. His shoulders are actually shaking he is laughing so hard...at me. I just glare at him. I actually think I may hate him in this moment.

"Dude!!!! Do you hear yourself?! Can you please, please, just admit to yourself – YOU are really into Tris! As you should be, she is your soul mate. Your true love. She completes you. Pick a sappy phrase of your choice. Bottom line, she is amazing and if you keep acting like an ass – she will turn away from you. And you will lose her forever!" Zeke practically yells at me.

I frown, and then it dawns on me, this whole time Zeke been making it look like he was after something with Tris – when in reality he was trying to get a rise out of me. Well it worked. But it is not for the reason he is hoping. At least I don't think so.

"Are you that self-centered, have you forgotten all that I told you about Shauna? She is my girl – she understands that I am staying here...for you Tobias, for now at least. She is home with her family and helping my mom as well. Don't worry – me and Shauna, we are good. You on the other hand are doing a great job of mucking things up." Zeke says.

I sit down at the conference table, and I place my head into my hands. "Zeke... this is not an easy situation for me, and I also know not for Tris either. And of course I remember what you said about Shauna, but just seeing you acting that way with Tris... Look, I am sorry." I look up to meet his gaze and sigh.

I rack my brain trying to understand what was behind my jealousy. And then I ask Zeke to listen with an open mind, because I am going to be as honest as possible. And if he doesn't like what he hears and no longer wants to be my friend – then so be it. Zeke nods his head for me to continue.

I start talking, "The truth is, and this is going to sound selfish – I just do not remember her. I don't remember her face, her personality, any inside jokes, what we were like physically, none of it. But at this point... I have heard so many personal details from you, and then the pressure I feel from Christina and Caleb... not to mention the way Tris looks at me... Look – I know that I am supposed to feel x, y and z for Tris. But the truth is I just don't." I see Zeke frown, but he nods for me to continue.

"I have been racking my brain on why seeing you act that way towards her bothered me so much. And here comes the part where I am going to be a complete ass... I felt like it would just be wrong for you, as my best friend, to go after her. I doubt she and I will ever get together, we can barely survive being in the same room without my doing something to further traumatize her – but at the same time I have accepted that Tris and I have this amazing history, even if in the past – it does exist. This history that I fear will always haunt me. I can only assume it is haunting her. I just feel like it would have been so disrespectful of my best friend to end up with the great love of my life. It would have been equally as wrong as if Tris had actually died, and then me and Christina decided to live happily ever after. I feel like it would cheapen the true love that was there first. It feels wrong, and I don't like it. At all." When I finish I look at Zeke. He is frowning. I finish, "Lastly, you have become – my actual best friend...today. Not because we have this amazing history, that I don't remember - - but because I genuinely like you. And I trust you. The person you are now, and who I am now."

But then he nods his head, and he does accept what I am saying. "I guess, I had really hoped that seeing Tris with anyone else – would trigger something in you. But I can see it did not have the effect I was hoping for. For the record, Tris only saw my affection as a good friend offering her comfort. So please don't get mad at her, or think she was playing games. That was just me, all on my own, toying with you." He smiles and laughs.

"I am just going to give you a warning, because I am your friend and I do care about you. If you keep pushing Tris away...she will turn away from you, she will give up on you. And that girl is so stubborn. Just make sure you know what you are really doing. Sometimes there is no way back." Zeke warns me.

I feel something stir in my stomach – but then I just push it away. "I understand Zeke." I mumble.

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We leave it at that, and call it a night. When I enter my apartment, there is a note on the floor that had been slid under my front door.

The note reads:

"Tobias,

We need to talk.

~ Nita"

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