Desolation

forty

First of all I apologize for not updating for months. I've had a lot going on and it's just so difficult to find the time to do the things that I absolutely love. I am going to finish what I have started and I also have more new things planned.

Thank you guys for being so patient and always supporting me and giving me all your love. I hope you like this chapter even though it's more of a filler but I promise better things are coming. Enjoy x

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Caspian walked in like he owned the goddamn place, kicking his shoes off near the door and making his way into my living room. He sat down on the couch, legs propped up on my coffee table and motioned for me to come and sit next to him.

I rolled my eyes but sat with him anyway, turning sideways so that I could see him.

It had been a couple of days since I had broken down while drinking my wine and listening to The Smiths. I felt a lot better since then but I was still lost in my thoughts all the time, I don't know what it was but I just didn't feel like myself.

"How have you been? Blake's been worried about you, he was gonna come as well but he had to go see a client," Caspian looked at me quizzically, scrunching up his eyebrows. He could probably tell that something was wrong. Other than Blake, he was the only one who could read me so clearly.

"I'm fine," I sighed and he raised an eyebrow at me, "Well at least that's what I think. A couple of days ago," I gulped and looked away from him, this wasn't gonna be easy to say out loud, "I had a lot going on in my head and I drank wine," I could visibly see Caspian's shoulders drop, he knew what was coming.

"I ended up listening to The Smiths and I remembered a lot of things that I shouldn't have and I broke down. I couldn't take it Caspian, it was too much," I shook my head and pulled my knees to my chest.

"Roselle," he said softly before reaching forward to engulf me into a huge hug. I buried my face in his chest and closed my eyes. He held me close and rubbed my back like he had always done ever since I was a little kid. I relaxed in his grip before finally pulling away.

"It's okay to get pulled back into the past sometimes but don't get stuck there. You know that, don't you?" he looked at me with kind blue eyes and I nodded my head.

Caspian had the biggest influence on the type of person that I was today. He was the one who made me get into working out and kickboxing. He was the one who turned a scared little girl into a strong and confident one. He was there all along, helping me every single time. He helped me through my mothers death, my depression and all the other issues that I had. He pulled me out of the hole that I was in.

"Thank you," I looked at him sincerely and smiled, "You've always been there for me no matter what and you have no idea how much I appreciate that. You've never given up on me Caspian and that means a lot to me so thank you," I squeezed his hand and he smiled back at me.

"How could I not? You're the strongest person I know. I'm so proud of you Roselle," he messed up my hair while laughing and I shoved him away, a small smile on my face.

"Why did you come here anyway?" I grumbled while getting up from the couch and going to the kitchen to get us beers. I walked back out and handed him one before settling next to him again.

"Wow here I was thinking that we were having a moment but you ruin everything," he put a hand on his chest, faking pain before he cheekily smiled at me and drank his beer.

"No wonder Kathy gets so easily annoyed by you. You're a complete goof ball," I took a sip of the bitter alcohol, letting it calm my nerves as it made its way into my system.