"My sister is gone." I stared at her, my mind racing to find some sort of reasoning.
"No."
"Would I lie about this!?!" She shouted, now sobbing and hunched over on her knees. I slid myself off the bed and tried to stand, only to fall. I tried to stand again and fell to one side. I looked down and froze again.
"W-what happened?" I stared in horror, trying to find it.
"You got in an accident. They had to amputate it." I reached my hand out, trying to feel for my right leg.
"It...it's gone."
"I'm sorry YN. There's nothing they could do. It was that or you die."
"I'd rather die! Lisa's gone and now I can't fucking walk! I'd rather be fucking dead more than anything right now!" I grabbed my knee and tucked myself into it, crying loudly.
"YN stop it. You know that isn't true."
"I lost my job now! I can't work! I won't be able to make money and feed Finnly! I'll have to give him away! Lena I can't lose my brother too!"
"That's why you both are staying with me."
"I don't your pity! I just want it all to be a horrible, horrible nightmare! I want it to be over!"
"YN Brooks! You have some real nerve if you thi- oh my god." I feel two arms wrap around me. "What the hell happened to you!?"
"Nothing." I shook my head in my arms.
"Bull shit! What happened?!"
"He got into an accident trying to save Lisa." Lena put her hand on my shoulder and helping me back onto the bed. I turned away from both of them and face a machine. I just watched my heart rate as they talked.
"What happened to Lisa?" I heard silence after that. She must be shaking her head. She does that so much when she doesn't want to answer. "I'm so sorry Lena, I didn't know."
"It's okay, I just found out this morning. I don't think it's all fully set in. I'm still trying to figure out if this is all really happening."
"Morning?" I turned around and looked at them.
"I stayed here all night with you. You were out cold. The doctors said the only thing that saved your life was that your front wheel had gone up, so it took the most of the impact. The bad part about it was your bike landed on your leg. They said you were fully paralysed for at least twelve hours."
"I-...okay." I nodded and laid back down. I hardly listened as they continued to talk. She can't really be gone. There's no way. She was the strongest person I knew. Even stronger than me. "Lena?"
"Yes YN?"
"She's not really dead. She might've faked it and ran off."
"I saw the body YN. One gunshot to the back of the head."
"Maybe it wasn't her."
"She looked exactly like me. I know my own twin. She's really gone YN. I'm so sorry. You tried."
"It's not good enough." I mumbled under my breath. I'm finding this out. I know she's not really gone. I know it. They talked more until the doctor came in and said I could be discharged if I wanted to. I accepted and left. Sarah offered to keep Finnly for a while until I can "get back on my feet" as she put it. Probably trying to lighten the mood. I gave her a small chuckle and helped myself into a wheelchair. Lena rolled me to her car and buckled me in like a child. She talked to Sarah some more before getting in the car.
"How're you feeling?" I shrugged and looked out the window. "Oh come on YN. Try not to think about it."
"How can I do that when I can't stand up to even take a walk?" I mumbled.
"Okay, don't forget about it then. I'm just trying to help."
"You don't seem very upset that your sister is dead."
"She's happier this way. If she's happy, then I'm happy for her. It's killing me not having her around, but, I know she's okay now. You should feel the same."
"I can't. At least you didn't know and couldn't stop it. I could've. I almost did. But, but I failed her. She gone because of me."
"She's not gone because of you YN. You tried to stop her. Some things are meant to happen for a reason. You'll just have to learn this."
"I'm not a little kid Lena. I know that's not true. I know she's not dead. Because if she was, I know I wouldn't be able to talk or eat. I know I'd be even more devastated than I am know. She's just, in hiding."
"Whatever keeps you going." She didn't take her eyes off the road until we reached her house. I was helped into a wheelchair and put in bed. The rest of the day was full of people I hardly ever talk to anymore and way distant family coming in to see how I was and bringing horribly cooked foods. I did what Lena said to and told everyone thank you though. I felt so diminished and degraded. The next few days were basically the same thing. I stay in bed and people come to visit. Whether it was friends or Lena bringing food and some "hopeful words". On the last Friday of the month I got a prosthetic leg so I could finally learn to walk again. It took months, but it happened. It was June 17th. Lisa and Lena's birthday. Me and Lena were sitting quietly on the couch, staring at the blank tv.
"She would've been 25." I mumbled, folding my hands in my lap.
"Yeah." Lena quietly agreed. I saw her jaw clench as she swallowed hard. "To think I was finally accepting she was actually gone. I don't think I'm ever going to get past it."
"Yeah. It feels like only yesterday."
"Yeah."
"So...should we, eat or something?"
"I'm not hungry."
"Me either really. I just don't want to sit here all day."
"Why?"
"It doesn't help to think about it. I rather be having fun."
"Without her? On her birthday? I couldn't."
"I know, bu-"
"But nothing." She harshly stated, sending me a short glare before returning her focus to the black television screen. I waited a moment for her to cool off before continuing.
"I just think she'd want you to have fun on your birthday."
"She'd kill me if she found out I was doing something without her."
"Yeah well she's not alive to do anything!"
"YN."
"I'm...sorry. I just-"
"I understand." She nodded, cutting me off. We sat in silence again for another hour until there was a knock at the door. I got up and answered it. It was Sarah with a big box with holes in the top, wrapped with blue wrapping paper with balloons on it.
"Hey Sarah. Uhh, what's in the box?"
"A surprise for Lena." She smiled.
"Okay, well bring it in."
"I can't."
"Why?"
"It's too heavy."
"Well I just help you then."
"No!" I gave her a weird look as she jumped in front of the box. "Umm, I just though she could open it out here."
"O-okay?" I shrugged it off as nothing and got Lena. She followed me to the door and stared at it, the first hint of a smile I had seen in months appeared on her face.
"Well, open it." Sarah smiled at her, motioning towards the box with her eyes. Lena stepped towards it and lifted the lid. She dropped it as tears rushed to her eyes. I felt myself fill with anger as my fists clenched.
"You little bitch."
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Next chapter up soon!!!
