Cry, my beloved people

Confused Part 12

"John, good heavens!  What brings you here this hour of the morning?" Lance was pleasantly surprised by his friend.

"Lance I am confused, " John said, shaking his head. "I have run away from home."

"What!  But why John?" Lance exclaimed, deeply concerned about his friend.

"I can't see any other way, I can't go for that medical test now!"  I have to write my maths paper today and want to finish my exams first.  My Mom insists, she can be so unreasonable!"

"You shouldn't do that John, it is for your own health that she wants you to go."

"I suppose so, but what difference will two weeks make?"

"It can make a difference, John."

"But Lance you won't understand what difference it will make to my self-esteem if I write the exams.  I've got to do it for myself."

"I think I understand," Lance said thoughtfully. "Though you have to talk to your mother John, you can't just run away from your problems."

"I know it sounds awkward to you, but I am only my mother's sick child, nothing more.  She has also forbidden me to see you again.  Can you see how hopeless everything is?"

"Keep up, old buddy, keep in there and don't let this weigh you down. I'm sure we'll come up with something. " Lance tried to reassure him.

"I feel so worthless if only I can pass my grade twelve exams this year. If I have to die after that, I'll be able to face it without self-reproach."

"I understand that John, but you have to look after your health too.  An exam on its own can be exhausting and the stress of this "running away" can do a lot of harm.  You have to talk to your mom and I will pray that you will be able to convince her."

"There is no time for that now.  My math's paper is due in about thirty minutes.  Reasoning with her will do no good."

"Then promise me you will go home after you have written your paper and talk to her and good luck with the paper, I know you will do well."

"I will try my best Lance, but I have my doubts.  I have to go now.  I'll have at least be in time if I want to write that paper."  He forced a smile at Lance, but it couldn't hide his dismay.

On his way to school, John wondered why it was so difficult for Lance to see his point of view in the first place.  Should Lance know something about cancer that made him careful or could he be jealous?

That's it, he must be jealous because he still has not written his grade ten exams.  Maybe it will be better to stay away from him until after the exams.

It will even fit in with Mom's policy.  How on earth am I going to convince her?  I'll have to put all this out of my head and focus on my maths, no time to worry about that now.