Someone So Perfect (JeffMads)

A Rewriting of My Letter

James didn't stop running. He didn't care for the confused looks he got from passersby. He just didn't want to see Jefferson. With a small nod to himself, James asserted that he wasn't going to forgive Jefferson. Not this time. He reached his office and locked the door once more, sitting on the floor with his back against the door. "The perfect person. The perfect person. The perfect person." He quietly repeated under his breath, hugging his knees to his chest.

Footsteps.

"Go away."

"James-"

"Allow me to rewrite my previous letter of confessions for you, Jefferson. I'm in the mood for it, and this is one letter I don't think you need written down."

"Don't be like this..."

"Why don't we start with...Thomas dearest." James said through gritted teeth. "I shouldn't call you dearest. After all, you're a lowlife scoundrel that'll never change his ways. You'll always be within my reach, but I can't strangle anyone. You'll always be walking just ahead of me, but I don't have the will to stab a man. I'm just a waste of space, aren't I? Something you think you can throw away as soon as you find something else. A sick man that refuses to be anywhere near someone such as yourself anymore. So why am I so close to you right now?"

Thomas lightly knocked on the door. "James, please..."

"Why did I always think about the circumstances of our first meeting? They weren't that special. Why did I think you looked angelic, like you were glowing? Only now do I see you've fallen far into the pits of hell. Why did I think you were the perfect person? You're flawed beyond what a person should be. There was nothing in this world that could have convinced me that you would have even thought of breaking my heart." James looked up to his desk. The desk where he had written the letter that revealed his feelings. "But you did."

Thomas froze on the other side of the door.

"Why did I always think about our 'close' friendship? Clearly you don't think we're close. Why did someone like me let their feelings get destroyed by someone like you? Why did I allow you to? Why did you converse with me that fateful day? You saw a chance to feel powerful by breaking someone else smaller than you. Why did I hope everyday that something like this wouldn't happen? And with you, no less." James stood up, breathing rather heavily.

"A-Are you okay?" Thomas asked with much concern, pulling out the letter pieces.

James' fist connected with the wall beside the door, making Jefferson jump. "Everyday I think about you. You're intelligent, witty, confident...everything I wish I could be. But of course, I'm doomed to drown in my own sorrows after today. After today, I shan't talk to you anymore."

Thomas felt his world shatter before him. He looked down at the letter pieces and frowned. "I'm not leaving until you read the rest of this letter."

"Why should I? There isn't anything else I need to know."

"But she-" Thomas groaned. "I'll kick down this door if I have to."

"Don't you dare."

"Open it."

"I'm not forgiving you." Silence followed, then the door lock clicked. The door creaked open and James looked out. "Not this time, Jefferson."

Thomas slipped the letter pieces through the crack in the door and James snatched them away. "There's no point in being mad about something you don't fully understand."

"Oh, I think I understand just fine." James scoffed, scanning over the letter. After reading, he faked a small smile and opened the door a little wider. "So maybe I didn't read the whole letter before. My fault."

"So am I-"

James' fake smile quickly turned into a scowl. "This still doesn't excuse the fact that you two discussed your meeting weeks prior. You know, the weeks when we were together?"

"When she said weeks, she really meant-"

"I don't really care what she meant. What really matters is that it's going to be real hard to get me to forgive you. Goodbye, Thomas." James pushed past Jefferson, the force strong enough to actually surprise the taller man.

Thomas' shoulders slumped, but his face was determined. "Just you wait."