All I Want

i'm here | 12

•Eldon•

I wake up early in the morning to find James not in his bed. I quickly get up and walk around the cottage, sighing in relief when I find him outside but with a cigarette between his teeth.

I open the front door and rip the cigarette from his hands. Throwing it on the ground and smashing it with my foot.

"What the heck, James?" I shout. He looks at me in shock, I was expecting him to get mad at me, "How long?" I demand

James stuffs his hands in his pocket, the way he used to do when he was himself, "Two months," He mutters

That's when I find my hand suddenly has a mind of its own. I watch in shock as I slap James in the face.

He falls to his knees and I see the hurt in his eyes, "Why are you doing this to yourself?" I whisper softly and help my best friend up.

"The pain is too much," Is all he says and he goes back to the door.

"Maybe it's because you don't know how to deal with it!" I shout at his back in anger, I can't continue to watch my best friend be like this.

"This is my problem not yours so stay the heck out of it!" James screams.

That's when Riley steps in the way of the door and blocks him, "It's all our problem, James and we want to help you,"

James freezes when he sees her, "Get away from me," He says angrily.

Riley suddenly pulls him into a kiss. I watch as James freezes again but doesn't pull away or kiss back. Riley notices and steps back.

"I'm here," She whispers softly and James holds himself steady against the door frame.

"You- you can't be," He mutters under his breath.

Riley takes his face in her hands to make him look at her face, "I'm here. I'm really here,"

He shakes slightly and I know that he's crying, "Riley..."

She nods, "I'm here, James,"

•Riley•

I watch as he cries in front of me. The old James was never like this, he always wanted to prove how tough he was to me and never cried in front of me.

Even when we broke up he wanted to be strong, for me.

When he left that office I wondered if he was crying. If he was curled up in one of the studio rooms and wondering why I did this to him.

I wipe away his tears with my thumb and he stares at me. Touching his hand gingerly on my cheek, just like he did when he was the old James.

"You're here," He repeats

I hear West and Emily come up behind me to see what is going on. Eldon smiles behind James.

Then suddenly James's hand drops to his side and he moves past me to his room.

I look after him in confusion and sadness, "What-"

Eldon sighs, "He needs some time to process everything,"

I nod slightly and take a seat at the table, "I thought maybe he was back to the person he was,"

"It takes time," Eldon says and takes another bar of 65% cacao out of the cupboard. He notices I stare at it curiously and he shrugs, "It helped me when I was going through heartbreak. I better go give this to him,"

I nod and watch Eldon turn away.

***
dedicated to Ameliah who won't stop asking me to update 😂