Harry Potter have to live with the Dursleys for another month, it's really not fun. Is it time to feel sorry for myself, or does anyone want to do it for me? Come on, feel sorry for me people.
Vernon Dursley:BE GRATEFUL WE'LL EVEN STILL HAVE YOU. Because of you, our home was defaced with letters, not to mention, when you left the shack with your giant oaf of a friend, you shot us all two middle fingers.
Harry Potter:Yes, the only act of rebellion in my ten years of living in your house was a rude gesture as I left towards the one glimmer of hope in my entire life. Yeah, I've really disrespected you.
Dudley Dursley:As always, just shut up, Harry. These past few days without you have been the best days of my life. I even gained a grain of respect back for my father.
Harry Potter:I have been gone for a single day though, seriously, went out in the morning, was back at night..
Dudley Dursley:To be honest, even a moment of bliss without you feels like years.
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Harry Potter is starting to feel invisible. For some reason, this is worse than being constantly despised by the Dursleys. I mean it's nice that at least they are not forcing me to do anything, but the are not saying ANYTHING, STOP IGNORING ME!
Vernon Dursley:Who are you?
Harry Potter:YOU KNOW WHO I AM. And I though you people were ignoring out of fear or something.
Vernon Dursley: Potter? Doesn't ring a bell. THIS IS FACEBOOK BOY, YOU CAN'T HURT US!
Petunia Dursley:Hehe (:
Vernon Dursley:Fix me a brandy, will you dear?
Petunia Dursley:I'm on it!
Harry Potter:NO. YOU WILL NOT USE MY STATUS TO FUEL YOUR RAMPANT ALCOHOLISM.
Vernon Dursley:Thanks. Life is so much better when we ignore...what's his name.
Harry Potter:RAWR!
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Harry Potter and Hedwig the Owl are now friends.
Harry Potter added "hanging with Hedwig" to their interests.
(Hedwig the Owl likes this.)
Harry Potter removed "communicating with other human life-forms" from their interests.
(Hedwig the Owl likes this.)
Harry Potter:Alright, Hed, now you're totally rubbing it in.
Hedwig the Owl:hoot (ok)
Harry Potter:Yeah, Hedwig, I get it. Enough.
Hedwig the Owl:hoot hoot (yes, ok)
Harry Potter:I can't understand what you are saying! What does hoot hoot mean?! With all respect, I'm not trying to be rude, but to us HUMANS, it just sound the same and means nothing, wish there's a spell or something to help me understand owl...
Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore: Yes, bottom corner of Facebook, change english to all animal languages.
Harry Potter: o.o Dumbledore! AHHHHH! :D Anyways, why do they even have that option?!
YOU ARE READING
Harry Potter I: Facebook Feed Edition
FanfictionWhat would happen if all harry potter characters were addicted to Facebook.
