Torn (Ethan Dolan)

~Chapter 18~

***

It's been a month since Ethan and I broke up and I've finally given up. I can't believe I actually thought spoiling him would earn his trust back. I've bought so many things and just last week I ordered a Jersey from his favorite hockey team and it's signed. It was worth about $200.

I was being such a push over as always and I hate myself for it. You should never pay for a man's heart, that's what my mom always told me. But here I am, spending hundreds of dollars just so I can be ignored more. Am I mad at him?  No, of course not... It was my fault. But you still shouldn't pay to earn trust or love.

I guess I was just so desperate to have someone love me,  but I'm done trying and breaking more everyday. I got everything that Ethan has literally ever left at my apartment or even bought for me. I packed it all in a big box and stuck one last note on top of the box.

I loaded everything in the car and started heading towards his apartment. Before I got out of the car to go and put the stuff by his door,  I took a deep breath to try and compose myself.

I was about to turn around the corner to go and set everything down when I heard two familiar voices.

"Bro, we have to make this video tonight..." Grayson sounded pretty annoyed.

"I know but I promised Meredith tonight..." Ethan said back.

"Can you please reschedule your date?" Grayson said running a hand through his hair. "Bro,  you're losing yourself now. You never wanna film anymore. You get so annoyed with fans and are rude. You've even started to act like you don't like me..."

Ethan looked at Gray, "Maybe I'm just ready to move on..."

Gray looked up at Ethan shocked and sad. It even made me sad, I used to watch their videos as a fan. I loved them,  I thought they were hilarious. It's heartbreaking hearing Ethan say that. But I can tell he doesn't mean it.

Even seeing Ethan from a mile away you can tell Ethan has changed. And not a good change.

"You're just saying that because of your little whore..." Grayson said and I knew exactly who he was talking about.

"Shut up bro, I have to go..." Ethan said  beginning to turn around.

"Go have fun with your little slut..." Gray remarked.

"I don't care if that was her past! I love her!" my heart broke in half. I must've made a noise because both Ethan and Grayson turned around.

"Julie?" Gray asked.

"Hey, ugh. Sorry, I just came over to drop off a few things for Ethan..." I set down the box. "Here ya go. I'm sorry, I'll leave now...."

I began to quicken my pace, tears streaming down my cheeks. I was about to cross the street to the parking garage but I heard someone running from behind.

"Julie!" Ethan's voice yelled for me. I refused to turn around and show him that I'm breaking.

"This is all the stuff I got for you..." he stated.

"I know..." I told him.

"Well why are you giving it back to me?" he asked.

"Because I don't need it..." I lied.

"I can tell you're lying..." he told me. "I know you Julie!"

"Fine..." I spun on my heel, I looked him in the eye and I actually saw his sorrow. "I can't look at it everyday without breaking a little more. Ethan I'm sorry!  I'm so sorry!  You know I never meant to hurt you. I've finally given up, you don't have to worry about me bugging you anymore. There is a gift in there for you though. Bye Ethan..."