Torn (Ethan Dolan)

~Chapter 25~

***

Coachella 2021. I'm 20 as of now and Ethan and Grayson are 21. We've been going strong for 2 years. Yeah we have our ups and our downs but I couldn't be happier.

I was in the bathroom getting ready. Ethan and I decided to match. I was wearing overalls with one strap unbuttoned. Under my overalls was a Nirvana crop top. I was wearing black sandoles and a black hat. My hair hung in loose waves and my arms were lined with henna tattoos. I also had black and silver rhinestones lining my eyebrows. My cheekbones had silver sparkles and I had cat eyeliner on. A black bandana was tied around my neck.

Ethan had black suspenders on with black ripped jeans. He was wearing a black Nirvana muscle shirt and black converse. His hair was swooped up and messy. He had a black bandanna tied around his head. He was also wearing black and silver rhinestones except they lined down his eyes by his ears and he had silver sparkles coating his cheekbones.

I walked out of the bathroom with Cam and Adrianna, Gray and Eth were sitting on the couch, eyes glued to their phones.

"Leggo..." Cam said throwing a pillow at Gray.

"No need to abuse me Cam...." Gray groaned standing from the couch.

Eth looked up from his phone and smiled at me. I gave him a weak smile back.

Ethan has been different lately, that sparkle in his eyes is gone. I'm worried for him. He doesn't look at me the same. He doesn't touch me the same. I'm probably just over thinking it and he's just stressed with modeling and keeping their YouTube Red show going as they update a weekly Tuesday video and a vlog channel whilst he works on a movie he's producing.

I'm so proud for him, but it's also worrying me. He never stops working, even this weekend where we're just supposed to have fun and dance he always has to leave to take calls and figure things out.

Ethan latched his arm around my waist and kissed me on the cheek. He made a disgusted face and laughed. Poking out his tongue, he had some silver sparkles on it.

I got on my tip toes and kissed him licking the sparkles off his tongue.

"Eww stop..." Gray said pulling his arm around Adrianna. I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed.

***

I was sitting on top of Ethan's shoulders whilst G-Easy was on stage. Ethan was jumping and I was singing along. I wasn't even scared to fall off his shoulders even though I probably would at some time. Ethan had his hands latched on my thighs and I was waving my arms around like a crazy person but so was everyone else.

I had to pee really bad so I tapped Ethan's head and he looked up at me smiling.

"I gotta pee!" I shouted.

"What?" he asked.

"I gotta pee!!!" I shouted even louder.

"What?!" he asked again.

"Ethan Grant Dolan! I'm gonna piss on you right now if you don't set me down!!!" he finally got the memo, laughing. He lowered me down to the ground.

"I'll be right back..." I said doing the peepee dance. He laughed, bending down and kissed my cheek.

I pushed and shoved my way through the crowd heading towards the portapotties. There was a long ass line waiting so I groaned and got in it.

I shifted back and forth on my left and right foot.

***

It's already been 30 minutes of waiting to go to the bathroom, everyone was groaning. I am 2.5 seconds away from peeing myself.

"Ok I really need to piss..." a blonde girl in front of me turned around. Oh my God. That's Ashley Benson! Inside I was squealing because I love Pretty Little Liars.

"Hey this might be a weird request..." she looked at me. "But I don't think we're gonna be getting a bathroom anytime soon, there's a bush over there..."

She pointed to a bush near the bathrooms, "I'll cover you if you cover me?" I laughed and nodded my head, "Yes, you are genius..."

We laughed and made our way over to the bush. I covered her while she went pee and then she did the same for me.

"I think we just became best friends..." she stated laughing. "Great bonding moment..." I laughed.

She handed me her phone and we exchanged numbers.

"Ok I'll text you sometime and maybe we could hang out?" she asked. I nodded my head and we said our goodbyes.

***

It took about an hour for me to find where we were last. It was an intermission so a smaller band was playing right now and people were clearing out so it was easier to find my way through the crowd.

I saw a guy that looked like Ethan but began to turn around when I noticed it wasn't him because he was dancing really close to another girl.

"Ethan... Bro." I heard Gray's voice and stopped in my tracks turning back around. It was Ethan.

"What are you doing?" Grayson asked.

"Dancing..." Ethan commented back.

"With another girl..." Gray stated, matter of factly.

"Yeah..." he said, no hesitation in his voice.

"You have a girlfriend!" Gray shouted at him but he continued to dance with the girl, grabbing her ass and kissing her neck.

"I'm sure she won't mind...." he stated. My heart broke in half.

"Are you actually kidding me?" Grayson scoffed.

"Bro I'm bored, I've had no excitement in my life. Calm down. I'm sure she's making out with some guy right now..." Ethan stated.

It not only hurt me that he said he's bored with me and needs excitement, but also that he believes I could do something like that. And it hurts a hundred times more that he doesn't give two shits if I were making out with another guy. Hell if I was being raped would he even care?

My heart crashed to the ground and I couldn't comprehend anything. I was speechless. I didn't make a sound. I didn't even let one tear drop.

I turned on my heel and headed for the exit.

***

It took me about two hours to find an available uber that ended up costing me $600.

I also agreed on walking 5 miles to get to the uber. I was wearing sandoles and after 3 hours of walking I made it to the uber, my feet were bleeding. Literally each toe had blood seeping from it.

I stepped into the car with no emotion. No tears had left my eyes. I felt nothing.

The uber driver scoffed at me, "You know you're gonna have to pay me more for making me wait."

I looked up into the rear view mirror at him, "I don't have anymore than what we agreed on."

"I don't need money..." he winked at me. I opened the door and got out of the car. I walked along the side of the road, my head facing down.

***

After hours and hours of hitchhiking I finally got picked up by a kind old man and he took me back to Ethan and my apartment. Luckily they were still gonna be at coachella for another day. I packed a suitcase full of things that actually mattered to me and got cleaned up. I left not looking back.

When I got to my hotel, I charged my phone. There were 99 messages stemming from Grayson to Adrianna, Cam, and of course Ethan. I erased each message and closed my eyes, falling into a well needed sleep.

***