Patience

Chapter 10 •Tori's POV•

Chapter 10 •Tori’s POV•

I smiled as I watched Gabe chat with Jason and Carter. It’s been three days since he confessed everything to Evie; I’ve noticed how much he’s changed since then. Gabe is more open now, he’s happier, he’s closer to the old Gabe.

I know Gabe would never be the same again; my death seemed to have affected him in ways I couldn’t describe. Standing here on Earth I could feel the guilty feeling freezing my heart up, something I couldn’t feel when I was up in Heaven.

The last thing I wanted was for my death to affect Gabe, or anyone for that matter. It was one of the reasons why I used to push people away. Though I love Gabe sometimes I felt myself regretting my decision of picking him.

Gabe hasn’t made much progress besides confiding in Evie, he hasn’t even looked at the letter once. I need to see Olivia, the thought of missing her grow up hit me hard. I needed to watch over her as much as I needed to watch over Gabe; in fact I need to watch over her more.

I needed to get Gabe to read the letter and quickly, I don’t know how much longer I can take this. I moved around the room quietly, though I knew Gabe, Jason and Carter couldn’t see me I still felt the need to do it.

Henry, Gabe’s father had told me that even though I was now part angel I will always be human at heart. No matter what a part of me will always long to be alive again, to be able to touch and feel things. Without realizing I watched as my hand was placed on the table. Instead of my hand going through the table like I expected with the car slipping through me, my hand actually touched the table.

My palm was flat against the table yet I could feel nothing. It was like I was touching the air, I yearned for the feeling of something, of anything really, but I knew that would never happen. I was no longer alive. I had to get used to it.

One thought came to my mind, ‘Does this ever get easy?’

“I wish I could tell you it does, but it doesn’t.” I looked to my right to see Gabe’s father, Henry standing there next to me. Usually I would have jumped in fright but I’ve gotten somewhat used to becoming an angel and can now sense another presence in the room.

“What’s it like?” I whispered, Henry stared at me with a small smile on his face, he knew exactly what I meant.

He let out a deep shaky breath “It’s not easy to see your child hurting. When I look at him all I want to do is be there to tell him that he’ll make it through this but then I realize I can’t. My powers are limited and even if I become a full angel it is forbidden to talk to the human world.”

“I just wish I could see Olivia.” I sighed “I love Gabe with all my heart but Olivia is my daughter, our daughter. I need to see her too. I just wish I didn’t have to just see one person.”

“Tori you can see Olivia.” He smiled “Olivia is a part of you, she is half yours. You are connected to her in a way you are not with others.”

“Really?” I whispered “I can still see her.”

Henry nodded “I wished I had known before or I wouldn’t have chosen to watch over Melissa, Gabe and Katie’s mom. My wife.” He whispered the last part.

“What about you, have you ever sent somebody to help them?” I smiled “Like how I sent Evie.”

Henry shook his head “My family didn’t need my help, Melissa is a strong woman. I knew she could help Gabe and Katie.”

“Do you watch over Katie?”

“Every day.” He replied back.

I let out a deep breath “H-How do I see Olivia?”

“You have to practice your powers; you have to practice teleporting places on your own. Do you remember when you walked away from Gabe, the pain that you felt?”

I could never forget it, it was gruesome, I felt like I was being stabbed. “I can tell you remember.” He chuckled “This won’t be easy but you have to practice leaving Gabe until the pain stops and once it does you will be able to see Olivia.”

“Why didn’t God tell me these things when I died?”

“Believe me I asked the same thing but Tori, God may be here to guide us and help us but he also wants us to figure these things out on our own. To work our way out, to adapt.”

I smiled “That makes some sense.”

Henry smiled back at me “You should head back up; your nana was making some tea.”

“Wait, I just need to send Gabe a daydream.” Henry nodded, as I closed my eyes I thought hard about what I wanted to send Gabe.

“Gabe.” I whispered.

Gabe was looking around for me, he was trying to find me but I wouldn’t let him. I was hidden. “Tori!” He called out “I know you’re out there!”

“Come and find me then.” I whispered back. I had imagined we were in a forest; it was like a game of hide and seek. I was hiding while Gabe was trying to seek me out. I heard his footsteps close and dashed behind the bushes.

I felt warm breath on the back of my neck. I squealed when I felt two warm hands wrap around my waist. “I found you.”

I turned around to face Gabe and smiled “I love you, you know that right?”

“And I love you.” He said confidently back. Gabe was leaning in to kiss me and as much as I wanted him to I knew I couldn’t. The daydream was too perfect, I had to ruin it to get my point across.

I pulled out a dagger that was hidden in the boots on my feet. Gabe stepped back with wide eyes once he saw what I was doing. “W-What?”

“Gabe, I’m sorry.” I whispered “I’m so sorry but I have to leave.”

“No!” He called out “Don’t leave me!” He tried reaching out for me but I moved back.

I pulled out an envelope containing the letter from inside my jeans pocket and held it out “You need to read this, you need to understand.”

“NO!” Gabe yelled as I sliced the knife through my heart.

When my eyes reopened there were tears streaking down. Henry was watching me with a solemn expression. “I’m sorry Tori.” He whispered.

I sighed deeply “You were right. I doesn’t get easy.”

My head turned to face Gabe; he no longer had a smile on his face. He was mortified by what I had just sent him. Carter and Jason didn’t seem to notice the change in his mood just yet, and I knew they never would.

Gabe closed himself off from the world quite well, something I wish he wasn’t good at. “I can’t watch this any longer.” I told Henry “I’ll be with my nana, tell me if anything happens.”

He nodded and I soon closed my eyes, feeling myself slowly floating back to the place where I knew feelings didn’t matter because they didn’t exist. The place where I could be happy.

When my eyes opened I was back in Heaven. The darkness I felt when I was down on Earth was gone now, replaced by a light of happiness.

My nana was smiling at me; it made me wonder how could such a beautiful and happy world exist. As much as I missed being alive, I also thrived off Heaven, this place gave me a happiness Earth could never give me.

Not even Gabe or Olivia could make me feel like this and they both were the two most important people in my life. “It’s time for tea Tori.” My nana said offering me a cup.

“Thank you nana.” Things may not being going well for me down on Earth but here, I felt whole and I knew that’s all I needed to feel for now.

~Terribly sorry for the long wait! Not the best chapter but i promise more to come will be much better! COMMENT AND VOTE!~Sam~