The Shadows of Memory Lane (Book 2) [Gxg]

Chapter 5

I resurfaced, and my undeniable human needs made me gasp for air. I feel weak every time I am in need of air. I used to wish for gills every time I blew the candles on my birthday.

September 6th. It was fast approaching. I didn't know what I was going to do on the day anymore. I'd probably go home this time because it was on a Saturday.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm so dependent on Haley. Yeah, people fall in love, and yeah they lose their loved ones sometimes, but nobody seemed to be as affected as I am. I hate being so weak. For needing her. For needing her so much. My life seems so meaningless without her. Whenever we had fights I'd rush to her house after my anger had calmed down (probably in seconds), ring the doorbell until she answered, and engulf her in a hug. And I'd say sorry. Even if it was her fault. Even if I had done nothing wrong. And I hated myself for it. But I've tried everything. I just can't get over her. Maybe it was because she met all the cliche expectations that I secretly loved to read in books. And maybe it's because I thought, knew, that she loved me as much as I did. But now? She doesn't love me back. Because she doesn't even exist. It makes no sense. Why do I even love her? Why does love have to be so complicated? Stupid maze. Stupid labyrinth. It's as if I don't know what to do with myself without her. It's as if my soul is roaming around aimlessly in the middle of nowhere.

Damn it. A day used to be hard enough, without seeing her, talking to her properly. Four years. Urgh. I've tried to make up my mind to forget her before but I keep falling back into my memories of her within a few days at most. I love Haley too much for my own good. I really need to find something, or even someone else to concentrate on. To waste my time on, without feeling like I'm wasting my time. And no I don't want to have another fling with some dude. Because I never concentrate on them. They never shift my focus from Haley. Maybe it's time. Maybe it's time for me to look for another girl. But I know, it's in the back of my mind but I know, that if my one hand holds another, my other hand will always hold Haley.

I shake my head once I get out of the water, and run my hand through my hair. The sun was dying. I sat on the sand, feeling it stick to my lower thigh. I lounged on the golden particles, basking in the last rays of the day. They renewed me. Once the sun had disappeared, and darkness had taken over, I got up to get my discarded clothes that were strewn around in the sand somewhere. I picked them up and brushed off the dirt and put them on, carrying my flip flops in my hand as I made my way back to the road. I didn't have my phone on me, for obvious reasons, so I decided to run back to the dorms. I put my flip flops on and started jogging... and then I remembered that I hate running, so I practically collapsed after five meters.

I heard a chuckle behind me.

"Need some help?"

I turned around, and grinned sheepishly at the girl above me, offering her hand.

"Ha, yeah thanks," I said, gladly accepting her hand.

She pulled me up with ease. Damn she was strong.

"Don't have a phone?"

"I tend to be careless at the beach so I left it in my dorm."

She laughed, "Haha, I see. I'm Jimena."

"Nice to meet you, I'm Linda."

"Since, you clearly can't run, how did you manage to come here?"

"Used a guy."

She smiled, a little sadly and looked down.

"Oh... you are straight," she muttered, quietly, probably thinking that I couldn't hear her.

"Hardly," I smirked. She looked up, her eyes suddenly lighting up mischievously.

She was hot. Yeah okay, that's pretty straightforward, you were probably expecting a paragraph of description.... fiiiineeee.