Holding Back (Lesbian Story)

The Complications of Falling

Author's Note (part one): So be aware that there will be a tad more character development/background on Maya in the beginning of the chapter.  Also, this chapter is kind of a build up for the next (?) chapter because it gives the story a certain mood that'll lead nicely into the next chapter, methinks :)

~Maya~

It was almost noon when Maya woke up in her bedroom on Saturday.  She had fallen into temptation the night before and had cuddled up to Leila when she thought her friend was asleep, and could help but ask aloud to herself why she was in love with the girl she had her arms wrapped around.  She didn't think Leila had heard, and she doubted that if Leila did, she would remember.  Now awake, Maya was surprised to find that Leila was still in her arms, and sleeping soundly.  Normally, when Maya stayed over at Leila's to make sure she didn't stop breathing in her sleep due to too much alcohol, Leila would toss and turn, occasionally making whining noises or slight whimpers.  

Still unable to resist Leila's allure, Maya didn't move away once she woke up.  Instead, she just held Leila close and stroked her hair now and then, thinking about the situation she was in.  She'll probably think I'm a total creeper when she wakes up but screw it.  It's not like she has to worry about me for much longer.  In a year I can move to a college on the other side of the country and forget all about her.  I did it before with Christie and the rest of the people at my old school, and I could do it again in a heartbeat.  She sighed as she recalled the memories of her old life at her old school.  She tried so hard to forget them, but just like Leila, she found that they didn't disappear very easily.  One person in particular she recalled--her ultimate torturer, John Romero.  Once Christie broke it off with Maya to stay with him, meanwhile breaking Maya's heart in the process, and outed her to the whole school as a 'lesbian slut,' John and his group of lacrosse player thugs would wait for her after school and torment her.  Mostly they called her names and threw spitballs at her, but one time it got too far when Maya stood up for herself and ended up in the hospital with a concussion and a broken ankle.  After that, her mom said enough was enough, and found a new job in Rosetown Springs where they moved to not a month later.  Now she was here, falling yet again for a straight girl, and setting herself up for the exact some situation once more.  The memories of John and his gang, combined with the pain of being so close to Leila right now overwhelmed Maya, and before she knew it, quiet, hot tears were leaking out of her warm brown eyes.

She tried furiously to wipe them away, not wanting to show any weakness, but one got away from her and landed on Leila's bare shoulder.  The impact of the little water molecule on Leila's skin was enough to wake her up, and she looked around blearily.  Her eyes finally settled on Maya's face hovering a foot above her own, and Maya could tell that Leila could see that she had just been crying.

"Hey," Maya said gently, trying yet again to wipe her eyes and avoid eye contact. "Did you sleep alright?  I hope I didn't wake you."

Leila frowned a little and reached up to wipe a stray tear away from Maya's skin.  "Yeah, a lot better than I have in a long while... I have a hangover, but what's new, right?" She laughed a little, but kept looking intensely at Maya.  "I think the real question is, did you sleep well last night?  You've been crying.  Why?"  She was still frowning a little at Maya in concern.  A weird sense of deja vu came over the two of them, but this time, the scene was reversed.  

Maya shook her head and started to speak. "It's nothing, I-"

"Bullshit."  Leila interrupted.

She was staring intensely at Maya, and if Maya weren't in such a damper mood, she would have been turned on like a light switch.  Those blue eyes are too pretty for their own good, thought Maya irritably.  Figuring that Leila would see through any lies she tried, Maya decided to give the partial truth.  "Life has been stressful lately.  Christie mentioned some stuff yesterday that I'd rather forget."