#Flirtationship

chapter twenty : the truth

I should've not done it. We were back together. For real. Not just as best friends. We were together. As lovers. Making out and having sex for weeks.

But I couldn't stay even if I wanted to. Even if I loved him and he loved me back. It wasn't the same anymore.

It was unfair but what could I do? No one knew I would end up like this. Not even me. I left the first time I knew about it.

I should've kept going. I should've not showed up when I already left. It was hard but I had to. But it was harder not to see him.

My dad felt bad that I had to leave Barcelona and go to London just to see him. He said I should just stay and get better. He was right, but days, months, and years without him felt like death, anyway.

I thought I should spend my days with him. At least with what I was still left of.

That's why I flew to London a day ago when we met at the London Bridge. That's why I made sure to enrol into his classes which I had no interest in.

Until he told me things I would have never expected. I was fine with seeing him and staying beside him as his old best friend. And then he said those words.

Words that would've made me want to stay but should've told me to leave. I couldn't stay. I would leave him whether I like it or not.

Lance was the one who talked me into it, when I kept on having stinging and numbing heartaches. He said I should see a doctor.

* flashback *

"Where are we going, Lance?" I asked him.

He did not answer me. I just found out that he took me to the hospital forcefully.

"I said I'm fine, Lance. Why did you have to bring me here?" I hissed at him.

He ignored me and just led me inside the room of a certain Dr. Philips.

When we got inside, a middle-aged woman welcomed us with a smile. She asked for us to come forward so we did.

"Who called for an appointment with me?" she asked politely.

"I did, doctor," Lance replied.

"So I assume you're the troubled one?"

He shook his head. "She is. Please, check her out, Dr. Philips. I'm worried about her."

Dr. Philips nodded and turned to me. "Tell me about this heartache of yours, sweetheart."

"I'm fine, doctor," I eagerly said.

"She passed out thrice, doctor."

I glared at Lance who did not seem to get bothered by me.

"I'm here to help you, sweetheart. Please be honest and tell me about your heartache."

I swallowed. "It was…stingy. Burning. Like a needle piercing me over and over again. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. My heartbeat kept beating faster and faster until…until I felt light-headed and…dizzy…and then I just passed out."

"Any common variable, or situation, that could've triggered these problems? Maybe a variable that has always been there when these symptoms occurred?"

I nodded and bent my head down. "There is. Ethan."

Dr. Philips seemed astounded. She leaned back on her seat.

"So it's a someone, then?"

I nodded.

"Who is he to you?"

I peeked at her, hesitating whether to tell her the truth or not. "My best friend."

"Your…best friend?" she repeated.

"She is in love with him," Lance but in, surprising me and the doctor. "My hypothesis here is she's in love with someone she can't have and when she gets…hurt…the symptoms show up."

Dr. Philips nodded and scratched her chin, thinking.

"Sweetheart, do you have a history of heart problems in your family?" she asked.

"There was my mom," I answered.

She nodded again. "I think you are suffering from a genetic heart condition problem. I am assuming you are not aware of it, either, yes?"

"Yes," I muttered.

"I might have to check it further to see what your heart problem is. Right now, I can tell you that you are suffering from tachycardia."

* end of flashback *

Later on I found out I was diagnosed with arrhythmia. It's when your heart beats either too fast or too slow. Tachycardia  was just a symptom at the time. It wasn't serious until I kept having it. If I stayed longer, I might have had heart attack. Worse, death.

That's why I'm leaving again. I should've not come back. I just made everything complicated…and painful for both of us.