Let Love Bleed - A Before You Exit Fanfiction (On hold)

seventeen.

"Ouch!" I whined silently as the last of the blood-filled tubes engrossing my veins was removed. I dejectedlly forced mysellf to exaine my aching arm, taking in my freshly scarred skin. I rubbed at the destruction in hopes the pain would vanish.

Joan, who was running off of 4 hours of sleep in the last several days stood in the hallway with my Doctor, silently filling out my release papers.

Toby stayed in the room with me. He hadn't said a word since entering, but him being there was good enough for me. Unlike Riley who hadn't even attempted to vistit me once in the past few weeks.

I reminded myself not to be upset, but I was, and there was no denying it.

"You're free to go Ms. McKnight." One of the main nurses announced as she entered the room, moving a metal tray with bloody napkins, my bloody napkins, out of the way. Joan was now in the room, grabbing my bags for me, already exiting the room and on her way to the exit.

I stood slowly, pulling my sleeves down, the ache seeming to only worsen.

Toby walked close to me and I heard his familiar desperate sigh. I gazed in his direction, his eyes already locked with mine.

"Mom doesn't know." He mumbled, the pain clear and hard on his face.

He didn't have to say, I already knew what he had meant. The whole town knew Bobby was back. What they didn't know was that Bobby wasn't alone. Connor.

"Where is he? Connor I mean." I continued in the same hushed tone Toby had given me. He shrugged his shoulders and continued walking. 

"He hasn't come home yet. Mom and dad thinks he's just in shock but I don't know how to tell them. If we should tell them."

"Toby! He tried killing me. He tried making Riley kill me. He's a monster!" I exasperated in a hushed, frantic tone.

"He's also my brother. I don't know what the hell is going on with him. But this is Connor. The same Connor who you've been best friends with for years." Toby argued, obviously knowing what Connor did was wrong, but not being able to accept him being punished for it.

"That is not the same Connor I've been best friends with for years." Was all I said and I walked out of the hospital doors, the sunlight feelings completely new to me.

-

The two story, white townhouse was no longer home to me. It never really had been. Being here felt wrong. It was just a terrible reminder that evil was in the things I loved and cared about most.

The door shut loudly behind Toby, and I felt my heart pound against my chest. I could hear Mark humming to himself softly. I walked into the kitchen silently, obviously my presence was unknown to Mr. McDonough who had put a handmade pizza into the oven. My favorite.

Mark was never much of a cook and I smiled gratefully at his effort., despite how crappy I felt.

I hugged him tightly from behind, clearly it had startled him.

He opened his mouth to say something but I interrupted him before he could. "I really appreciate all of this, and after my nap I'll have some. Thank you." I kissed his check and turned out of the door.

I was supposed to be heading to the living room so why was I racing up the staircase? Why was I forcing myself down the long, dimly lit hallway and to the all so familiar white oak door with a large sigh that read "KEEP OUT". 

Instead of knocking I placed my hand on the doorknob and slowly turned, hearing a faint click.

Pushing the door open in a swift movement I looked in, a bare back facing me, laying on a black sheeted bed. I instantly felt my heart ache and my throat close up. I stepped inside the room and shut the door behind me, making sure to lock and secure whatever would happen next.

I found my movements endless and heavy. 

"Any day now Kody." Riley's soft voice broke the silence, his back still facing me.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and approached his bed, standing over him, his eyes open and staring past my body and at the wall. 

I tried wrapping my mind around what I wanted to say but my thoughts were such a mess I didn't even know what that was, My throat burned and my hands tingled from how tight I was clasping my fists. 

I hadn't noticed Riley get out of bed until his soft breath was hitting my face. He was so close to me, but yet somehow so far away. I looked up, his height incredulous compared to mine, and his soft caramel orbs focused on my face. 

I bit my lip, a tingling hand running through my messy locks as I balanced myself on one foot, unsure of what to say.

"Listen Ri-"

"Stop. I don't want to hear it." He said bitterly.

"It's not your fault. You would never hurt me."

"Stop! Just stop!" He grew more frustrated, kicking something across the room.

"THIS!" He exclaimed, pulling me towards him, pushing my hair to my back, and running his warm finger running along a pink scar on my neck, "HAPPENED BECAUSE OF.. me" He choked out, looking as if he was going to pass out.

"I did that to you. I-I tried killing you." He whimpered. The Riley I knew who never let anyone or anything hurt him. The Riley that never showed emotions or let anything break him had just broke. He dropped to his knees, a look of defeat washing across his face. 

I knelt down beside him, my hands shaking and my mind spinning and I took his hand in my own. "It wasn't you Ri. It was something else. Someone else. I don't know how but I know it wasn't you. You'd never hurt me." I forced the last part out, not even knowing if that was the truth anymore.

I tried not to cry but I knew instantly when another finger was brushing back wetness that was spilling out of my eyes I had failed.

"Shhh. Don't cry. Come here Kody." Riley shushed, pushing himself forward, pulling me into a bone crushing hug. My hair spilled all over the both of us, but Riley didn't care, he buried his face in my wild curls. My face was pressed to his bare chest, my tears spilling and blurring my vision.

Riley rubbed my back and sat silently, lightly kissing my temple and rocking me back and forth. I could feel my hair becoming wet, knowing he had been crying too.

I was just so confused and broken and I didn't know what to do anymore.

I pulled back, still in Riley's grasp and my eyes met his through burning blurs. I laughed softly and he cocked his brow.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked in plain confusion.

"You're supposed to be wiping my tears. Not me wiping yours." I laughed once more, using my thumb to brush away his bitter tears as I cupped his cheek.

He chuckled despite the situation and he leaned forward, leaving a lingering kiss to my forhead.

"You do things to me no girl has ever, or will ever do to me." Riley grinned, his tears beginning to cease. I rested my head against his chest, closing my eyes. 

"I'm so tired." I whispered, feeling my head spin faster and faster. Riley stood, holding me in his arms. "Sleep with me." He smirked, helping me into his bed.

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I know I'm terrible

and this chapter sucks

and I suck at updating

but I promise more will be to come

and it's certainly just the beginning.

Please let me know what you think!

Thanks for reading!

xx