I am NOT a fallen angel

Life Hates Me

My eyeliner-ruined eyes were blurry with tears and I just stood there. What could I do? I had lost everyone I loved. First Byunghyun, and now Seunghyun. I tried to control my breathing and turned unsteadily to Yang Hyun-suk. "I'm sorry." His confused face morphed into a gentle and sympathetic smile. "It's fine. I'm sure you'll give him reason to come back. As for now, you can go home and fix yourself up." He patted you and the back, "Thank you" The other Big Bang members looked on with equally sympathetic looks and G Dragon stood up. "I'm sure he'll forgive you" with that, he gave you a warm and comforting hug before sitting back down. Wordlessly, you gave him a watery smile of gratitude before walking out and once again, hearing the light click of the door.

"What happened?" Jessica's eyes were wide with worry and confusion. You silently packed up your belongings and walked out of the office ignoring her inquiring voice.

"What happened?" "I saw Seunghyun walking out too, maybe a fight?" "No way, they're too sweet" The hushed whispers of the employees fell on deaf ears. You could hear them talking, but it didn't really register. Who cares?

The weather was just so damn nice, so unlike my heart. I saw other couples together and all I could hear was my own heart crack. I had believed in Seunghyun alone after losing Byunghyun but here I was, left alone. I guess nothing lasts forever.

The house was dark. Empty. I was so broken, so lost, I didn't have anyone to look to.

The clock read 9:00. I guess I had been walking aimlessly on the streets longer than I thought.

I threw open my closet and rummaged through my clothes. Here. You pulled out a short revealing dress and pair of high sequined heels.

You rubbed at your face wiping off the remaining eyeliner and mascara from earlier this morning. You wanted to start over. You wanted to forget.

The foundation poured effortlessly on you skin and turned it milky smooth. Your now darkly lined eyes and bright lips made you into a new person. You had never used this much makeup at once. Who cares?

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The bright lights blinded your eyes. The club's stairs suddenly seems so long. Each step was so heavy. You no longer wanted this, you didn't want to have to be so crooked. You giggled darkly. Like it mattered anyway.

You finally made it to the dance floor. The crowed people suddenly didn't seem so appealing either. But you were up for some vodka. Vodka would wipe away your problems. You sat down at an empty booth a few shots you had taken off the tray of a waiter. You downed one relishing the sting of the alcohol and the wave of dizziness that came with it. You grabbed a second and gulped it down. With new found energy, you bounced off to the dance floor and without a thought, danced. No fear, no sadness, no nothing. Just uncontrollable giggles and a pulsing head.

A warm hand reached out and caught yours. You turned around with a smile. "Yes?" A hot guy was holding your hand and coaxing you to dance with him. What could be better? You mindlessly let him circle his arms around your waist and pressed yourself against him. Who cared who he was? He looked hot and that's all that mattered right now.

He pulled you to a crowded booth where other people looked you up and down. You sat next to another hot guy and took his drink taking a sip before handing it back to him with a sly smile. Who cared how you acted tonight? You were being crooked anyway. The first guy pulled you back to him and gave you his drink. How possessive. You downed his before grabbing a beer on table and finishing it, feeling the need to be drunk just to forget the events of today. Finally calmed with your dose of alcohol, you looked at the man who had been dancing with you. He looks familiar... "What's your name?" you asked twirling his tie in your fingers. "You don't remember me?" You looked up again in confusion that was doubled with alcohol. "I'm Hoya remember? I thought you remember by the way you were dancing with me!" You felt so stupid. That's who he was. The other hot guy you had taken his drink from was Sungyeol and the others were the members of Infinite. "I remember now" you said feeling your head pulse again. "This is such a coincidence"  he exclaimed clearly quite sober. "We invited Teen Top this time too!"

What the F*ck.

Life hates me doesn't it?

Really, f*ck you, life.

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