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Chapter Thirty-Two

Happy Halloween! Sorry, can't afford candy so I can't pass it out hahaha...here's an update! Hope you enjoy! :]

Sayuri ended up somewhere she never wanted to be--the hospital. How many days did I miss? I haven't finished that essay, too. What if--"Sayuri." She'd been too worried that she hadn't noticed the figure by the bed.

When her vision cleared, she was relieved to find Sakura Haruno beside her. What if it had been Kakashi? She thought. I bet he didn't even bother to come. He must've been happy I was gone.

"Sayuri." Her roommate called out once again. "What--Why?" For once, she heard the pinkette's voice waver. She was at first confused by Sakura's question, but then she recalled the other day's events.

The bottle.

"I can't tell you," Sayuri signed, her hands signing at a reluctant pace. "It's just some drama."

"Some drama?!" Sakura's voice grew dark. "It was not just some drama that caused this. I know it. What happened? Tell me! I want to help you. Please!"

"I don't care if you don't need my help. I want to help you, whether you like it or not."

Sayuri so desperately wanted to tell her. She wanted to share everything--she just wanted someone that understood. Kakashi never did because he never cared. And she never had any friends to talk to, up until now.

But if I tell her, she thought. Kakashi will be very disappointed in me. He knows that it isn't right to involve her into this business.

But if you don't, then you'll keep suffering.

I've been doing it for years, what more is the rest of my life?

I just need to manage until this blows over.

Sakura will sure get some bad looks after people hear her roommate did...this.

"Whatever it is, it isn't going to go away on its own." Sakura reasoned, gripping the girl's hand gently. "Tell me and I'll help. Your brother can too. He's on his way."

Those raised the alarms in her head. She pulled away from Sakura's grasp, ripped the IV out of her wrist, and picked the clothes up from the counter. She changed in the bathroom and came out to find her brother sitting there on the bed. Dang it, she thought.

"Sayuri, oh, I was so worried," Kakashi got up from the bed and wrapped his arms around Sayuri's smaller frame. She felt as though she was going to be crushed. "I heard what happened...can we talk in private?"

No, no, please don't leave--The door slammed shut and Kakashi quickly pulled away. Though Sayuri didn't like him anywhere near her, especially hugging her, she felt the warmth pull away. "What were you thinking?"

She only stayed silent. "Are you stupid? No, you're retarded. What you did was just idiotic. What did you think you'd get out of it? Fame? That Sakura would care for you?"

Silence. Don't try to protest, she thought. He'll twist your words and turn them against you. He'll just ruin your life even more.

"I can't believe you. You know what? Do it again. No one will care."

Her blood boiled and she clenched her fists tighter. She swallowed the fear down her throat and the anger bubbled to the surface.

"I don't care if anyone doesn't care..." She stated in a coarse, low voice. Kakashi turned towards her, amusement visible in his eye. "But what I do care about is my brother. I pity you. What happened to make you so corrupt, so cruel? I've given you countless times to apologize. I've been pushed to my limits.

"You know why I did it? I did it because I was so sick and tired of this life--of this life with you and everyone else in it. I've done all these things for you. I've never done anything wrong, yet you always seem to point out every single flaw I have. And why? Because of my sexuality. You're supposed to be my brother, Kakashi."

She couldn't say anymore. Her voice choked and all she could do was stare. She wanted to see his reaction, to see if he cared now. But he just stood there.

She sighed and shook her head. "I knew you never cared," she signed. "It was stupid of me to have my hopes up, but it's not my fault for that.

"I don't care what you think of me anymore. I've given too many chances. All these times you've been disappointed in me, and now it's my turn to be disappointed in you."

...---...

He pretended he didn't understand sign language.

He pretended he hadn't picked up the book and learned it before leaving Konohagakure to the university.

Why do I still care?

...---...

"Sayuri--" Sakura couldn't even force the word out of her mouth before said girl stormed to the bathroom. She heard the shower turn on, so the pinkette sat down on the bed.

Why is she suffering? That thought wondered around Sakura's head since the start of the day. Why would she ever do that?

Whenever I mention her brother, she gets panicked. She noted.

What if--"No, that'd never happen," Sakura murmured, biting her lip. "But, what if it really does happen?"

Sakura Haruno sighed and waited for Sayuri to step out of the bathroom.

Because I need to hear it from her herself,

If Kakashi's the reason why she tried to kill herself.