I want you.

Im sorry.

I have gotten in the habbit of just walking in Roberts house and not knocking.

I walk in.

"Hey Robert!" I shout taking my shoes off.

"Hey babe! im in the kitchen!" he shouts back.

I go to kitchen and he sits down drinking something and reading a magazine.

He stands up and gives me a peck on the lips. He sees the uneasy look in my eyes.

"What? whats wrong?"

I can't look at him.

I have to do this. Im going to hurt the one I love. I hate this.

"I am going home."

I look back up at him.

"But you just got here."

he says.

"No not that home I mean im going back to New york."

His face goes blank and his eyes water quickly.

My heart sinks and my eyes build up with tears.

"But, why? I thought you wanted to be here with me and..." he stops talking and looks away from me. Why am I doing this? I love him so.much and I dont want to hurt him. But I have my reasons.

"I need to go back home. Work things out with Tom. I need to think things through."

He looks back at me his eyes red. The tears come down his face.

"Its always Tom isn't it? It will always be Tom." He says letting his voice crack.

I start to cry. 

I didn't say anything. I kiss him on the cheek and I walk away. I stop and turn around facing him.

"I leave tomorrow morning." I say informing him. Seeing him cry  hurt makes my veins my heart ache. I walk out side and I just let it all out and cry even harder.

   I pack my last bag. My mom walks in. "Dont forget this!" She says handing me my tooth brush.

"Thanks." I slide the tooth brush in one of the bags that lay on the floor ready and packed.

I sit on my bed. She sits next to me.

"Are you sure about this?" My Mom asked.

I look at her. My eyes were puffy from crying.

"Yeah."

"Honey why are doing this to yourself?" My mom asked rubbing my back.

"I don't know. I just feel like if I have time away from Robert then I will realize how much he really means to me." I say.

"What do you mean sweaty?"

"When I was away from Tom I didn't really miss him. Not even a little. That just showed me that maybe were not ment together. If I distance myself from Robert maybe I will finally realize he's the one for me." I explain.

I look at me my mom letting the tears come down my face.

My mom wipes the tears off my face and tucks my hair behind my ears.

"I have one thing to say. And that is to always remember to follow your heart. And if you do that then I promise you will end up with the right person." She kisses me on the forehead.

"Get some rest. You have to get up early tomorrow." She says standing up and walking out.

I stop her.

"Mom."

"Yes?"

"Thank you." I say.

She smiles and walks out.

I turn the lights off and get into bed. That night I cried myself to sleep.