The Loner

Chapter 4- Proof Yourself

Chapter 4- Proof Yourself.

Lauren's POV.

After Zayn told me to trust him, I only looked into his eyes. Noticing the slight colour of green mixed in his brown eyes. His long lashes wide open while he says the words to trust him.

But that is the thing, I don't trust words.

Words can be made up and lied, even doing something can all be an act. It needs to be proven.

I barely talked with someone in my high school life. I was always that kind that avoided any contact with someone, so that is what I am doing. Avoiding him. After our argument the school bell saved me. Reminding me that it is time to leave and go to the mall.

Let's say that I literally ran away from my problems and my fears.

I don't wanna fear a broken heart, I don't wanna fear betrayal, I don't wanna feel forgotten.

I was just fine being on my own. The loner of my school. Trying to concentrate on my school work and my job. I need to focus on my life and a bright future. I don't need drama mixed in my miserable life. I don't need someone to save me from my problems. It is my life and I need to deal with it and I am being patient.

After all what would he say when I told him that my mom had a disease, that she died in front of my eyes, that she was murdered by my drunken dad, that my dad is drunk all of the time, that he abuses me and finally that he is the only one that I have right now. He would think I was weird and ignore me like I didn't tell the biggest secret at all or he would just ignore me and never speak to me again. I don't wanna deal with something like that.

Hell, maybe he just wants to know my secret to tell it to the whole school.

Maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe.

That is a bad reason to be alone, you over-think every single thing in your life. You think about the deepest things and get yourself frustrated. You make yourself hate the world or yourself. You make yourself believe in things that might happen, but maybe they won't happen at all. Maybe it is just a fear that you're afraid of to face.

One week passed by and I succeed in avoiding Zayn. I barely saw him and it was good to be left alone again.

I made my way into school ready for another day of school. I put my guitar in my locker and grab my books. Just on time like everyday the school bell rings and first period begins.

Don't you just love education? Because I don't.

I take my seat in the very back corner in class and close any type of contact with anyone but the teacher. Pointing all my attention to him, until I heard the jock enter the classroom. I let out a sigh and faced a random spot on my desk.

Please just walk away from me, just please don't look at me, just please act like I don't exist. My thoughts were playing around when I felt his gaze on me. He stood a few desks in front of me and looking at me. He made no move for a good five seconds and more heads turned my way, wondering where Zayn was looking at. I was biting my bottom lip as I tried to ignore the urge to look into his eyes again, like I did last time.

But it was no help.

Seconds felt like hours and I gave in. I looked up and met his brown eyes. He noticed it and I saw a spark in his eyes and his smile grew into almost a grin.

"W-What?" I say clearing my throat.

"That's my seat." He says. All eyes were officially on me right now.

He should know by now that I hate any type of attention?

"No it is not, I sit here ever since high school started." I tell him and I already heard some whispers going around.