Dear God (Avenged Sevenfold)

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is to hold her when I'm not around

The next few days flew by in such a blur that Natalie had a hard time remembering what day it was and where she was supposed to be. The doctors and specialists ran a gamut of tests on both Brian and Bryleigh which caused her daughter to be highly upset most of the time. During these times she grew closer and closer to Brian, often reaching for him after being poked and prodded. Natalie secretly fretted over this, wondering how Bryleigh was going to cope with it once Brian went back to California but for the time being she would worry about what was at hand. Thank god for Ava and even Matt who were there for moral support and an extra set of hands when the need arose.

Once everything was cleared and good, the doctor admitted Bryleigh to the hospital for preparation of the bone marrow transplant. Brian and Natalie were offered a room at the Ronald McDonald house attached to the hospital in order to stay near to their daughter. Natalie hated the thought of Bryleigh in a sterile, cold hospital room all by herself but the doctors were adamant that during the night both her and Brian clear out. Their first night in the offered room had Natalie pacing, nearly on the verge of tears at being away from her daughter. "Nat come on, sit down here" Brian stated gently, patting the couch cushion next to him with what he hoped was a convincing smile. He himself was more tired than he could ever imagine. Between all the tests, questions, paperwork and painful procedures he was just about wore out but he didn't show it. True to his form, he kept everything buried down deep to deal with later...in private.

Natalie flopped down on the cushion next to him but after a minute she was back up again, pacing back and forth while muttering to herself. "I'm worried too honey but the doctors got this, they know what they're doing." Natalie shot him a look, wondering if she should talk or not. "Yea well excuse me if I tend to worry a little more than you do. This is my daughters life we're talking about and I haven't been away from her one day in her life." Brian got up and walked over to her, putting his hands on her arms "She's my daughter too ya know...that doesn't mean I don't worry any less than you do." Natalie gave him a stern look before yanking her arms away and stalking over to the window, looking out onto the city night life. "You don't understand...you've only been in her life for a few weeks." Brian scowled at her backside, mentally counting to ten to curb his anger before he chose to talk again. "And who's fault is that? I would have been in her life a lot sooner if I had known about her."

Natalie turned and looked at him, her arms crossed and a stormy look on her face. "Something tells me you would have flipped shit on me if I came at you with a big pregnant belly. You were too busy living it up!" Brian's anger bubbled higher as they glared at each other and began yelling. "How the fuck would you know?! You didn't even give me a chance until she got sick! Had she not gotten sick I wouldn't even know about her...WOULD I?! That's really sick of you to keep a kid from their father you know!" Brian felt like an ass for yelling at her as soon as the tears came to her eyes but he couldn't help it. He was scared shitless on so many levels and he wasn't sure how to deal with them right now. "Let's face it Brian! You weren't exactly father material back then! As you always made it a point to say whenever anyone asked you about kids so yea! I did keep her from you because I didn't want her to be turned down...dismissed like a piece of garbage that littered your perfect rock star life!" Brian stormed over and got right in her face, his anger barely contained now "You didn't even give me a fucking chance! You just kept her to yourself based on a judgement that YOU passed! God dammit Natalie don't you get it?! I'm fucking trying here and all you're doing is throwing it in my face!"

Brian had every intention of storming out of the room to go in search of a few drinks to calm his temper but he knew in the long run that wouldn't solve anything. Instead they stood there staring at each other, Natalie's face full of heartbreak, tears and anguish while Brian's face was a storm cloud of anger and hurt. After a few minutes her head dropped and she sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I'm sorry Brian...you're right. I should have told you from the start but I was so scared. I wasn't ready to be a mother and we didn't exactly part on the best of terms. I thought for sure you would have gone ballistic on me. I'm so, so sorry...I don't even want to think where we would be and what her health would be like if it weren't for you right now. You literally saved my daughter's life." Brian sighed softly, his anger quickly leaving his tired body. Tipping her chin up to his face he gave her the faintest of smiles, rubbing her cheek with his thumb. "OUR daughter...I saved OUR daughter's life...and I would do it again in a heartbeat." Natalie smiled, her eyes filling with tears again as she hugged him around the waist and cried quietly into his shirt while he rubbed her back, his own eyes misted over with tears he rarely shed.

After a few minutes he cleared his throat and pushed her back gently at the shoulders "Can you tell about everything?" Natalie looked at him with confusion, not sure what he was asking of her. "Can you tell me her story? From the start...so I know what it was like before she came into my life?" Natalie smiled and pulled him over to the couch where they sat, side by side for the next three hours as she told him every aspect of her life from the time she found out she was pregnant to now. "You know, this is almost a blessing in disguise if you think about it" she stated softly, her voice tired and sleepy "If she hadn't gotten sick I probably would never had had the courage to find you. She really loves you Brian...for what it's worth I think you're becoming an amazing father."

Brian smiled tiredly at her words, he never knew he could fall in love with someone so quickly but here he was, completely in love with his daughter he barely knew. Soon enough they were falling asleep on the couch with their arms wrapped around one another.

This is kind of a rushed, filler chapter. The next couple of ones will be filled more content.