Audrey Holly: Life at a Prison (TWD SydiaX fanfiction)

Episode 20: Goodbye

It was a few days after the attack. Every time I woke up, my hands were shaking. It was pathetic and awful, but I couldn’t get my sisters face out of my mind. The blood all over me.

I decided to forget about it. Put it in the past. The group still believed in me. I’m not going to hold onto the past. The past wasn’t worth it.

It’s true. My father used to molest my sister and I. My mother left because of it. She didn’t even take us with her. I spent all my childhood life in fear. What the Governor said was right. I never had a boyfriend. All those years with my father abusing us tainted any thought of a real relationship. It wasn’t important anyway. The last year I was in high school, my sister left. She never told me why. Maybe she just couldn’t take it anymore.

She was a grown woman and didn’t feel like I needed her help anymore. I don’t know how I survived that last year. I would stay out studying, run away, get into detention, sneak into the house, anything to be away from my father’s mansion and drugs.

There were times I called the cops but my father was very rich and very important. His reputation was also very strong. He could kill someone and get away with it. You don’t realize how sick it is for a father to have sexual urges towards his daughter till you actually think about it.

                I had to defend myself many times in those 365 days. But it was my sister who really protected me up till my 18th birthday. She taught me how to shoot in case I needed to. She paid for a few survival classes. Things like that. But, when I moved away to college, we reconnected.

                She and I were civil with each other. But when you grow up, and you’ve had a childhood like that, you notice just how sick and screwed up it really is. How could we function properly? It was never too bad. It could have been a lot worse. We were just entertainment on the side for him mostly.

                There was still this big thing over our heads every time we met. Just bubbling beneath the surface. We never confronted it or dealt with it. Just suppressed it. I never had a boyfriend. She on the other hand was able to get plenty.

                It was in the middle of my second year at college when she was staying in town that the outbreak happened.

                We were rich. We had guns, supplies. Things like that. We were stuck with each other. But she became a totally different person when she met the Governor. He didn’t even know I existed till she informed him apparently.

                It was a mistake to head for Atlanta. A big mistake. It led us to this. She left me for dead. It was never about us looking out for each other. It was just about her. She abandoned me before, this was her doing it again.

                Then I met Rick and everyone. And I can finally put this grudge, this dirty past to rest because I’ve dealt with it.

                I’m home.

                Carl and I walked outside in the morning to pick some flowers for his mothers grave. We were standing by the fence when I looked at the few walkers near us. I spotted one woman with a silver chained necklace that had a small circular diamond on it. “That’s pretty.” I smiled. Carl stood and looked at the piece of jewelry.

                “I’m sorry about your sister.” Carl said as he hung his head underneath that enormous hat.

                “Don’t be. Save it for someone who deserves it.” I smiled.

                Carl just looked at me. “Then I’m sorry for you.”

                His words just reached my ears and made me smile. I scoffed. I would have bent down but then I’d be looking up to him and he wasn’t seven. He was 13.