Still Burning

7- Blue

It was a warm November day. People still walked around in jackets but there were no gloves or scarves in sight- not many anyways. The past week had been pouring down with rain so Andy was glad that for one day it had stopped raining.

She walked along the pavement, the shopping bag full of fresh produce on her shoulders. She didn't need the car today because she planned to meet with Nathan and they would make their way to the GP for her appointment. They had been trying to get pregnant for the last month but she knew with her higher levels of testosterone, it would be a bit difficult. Nathan had said not to worry and arranged to see a doctor to discuss things further.

With a sigh, she opened the door for the firehouse. Nathan was walking out the kitchen but didn't see her. She knew from the tensed shoulders and straight back that he wasn't in a good mood.

Deciding to give him some space, she went into the kitchen and greeted everyone with a smile. After placing everything down on the counter, she took off her jacket and walked to Nathan's office.

His blinds were down. His door was closed. Throwing her shoulders back, she let out a sigh before knocking on the door. Once Nathan saw her, his gaze softened and he opened up his arms. Andy threw the jacket on the bed along with her bag before shutting the door. She walked up to him and he immediately pulled her into a hug.

"I was just gonna call you," he mumbled into her stomach. She kissed the top of his head, pulling him closer.

"What's wrong? Bad call?"

He didn't speak for a few minutes, just holding onto her. She ran her hands through his hair knowing it would relax him. "There was a kid..." He spoke quietly. "She was practically a newborn, only a few days old." Andy leaned down to kiss the top of his head. "Her mum put her in the deep freezer, locking it. The dad came home, he missed the birth because he was away at work and he asked where the baby was..." She heard him sniff and hugged him tighter. "The baby was so blue," he croaked. "So blue." His voice cracked at the end and he broke out into a sob.

"Shh, it's okay," Andy whispered, feeling her eyes burn with tears.

"She was just a baby, De," he said as he broke into another sob.

* * *

Andy quietly opened the office door. She stopped beside the desk, looking down at a sleeping Nathan. With a smile, she put the plate down on the table and sat by his legs. Once her hand was on his thigh, Nathan stirred. He opened his eyes with a groan. He was always a light sleeper.

"Hey pumpkin," his said, his voice heavy with sleep. He rubbed his eyes before sitting up. "How long was I asleep for?"

"Only an hour. If we didn't have the appointment I would have let you sleep longer." She kissed his cheek before standing up. Nathan quickly held her hand before she could walk away.

"Stay," he whispered. She smiled at him before pointing to the plate of food. He let go of her hand with a blush. Once she came back to him, he took the plate off her and put it on the floor. Before she could say anything, he took her hands in his. "I'm sorry. You were already nervous about this appointment and I should have been the one to calm you down and say everything is going to be okay."

She shook her and without saying a word, she placed her lips on his. "Don't you ever apologise for being upset."

"It's always harder when it's kids," he whispered. "A lot harder." He shook his head with a sigh, straightening his back. "Forget about it." But she knew he wouldn't. "Now, have you eaten breakfast?"

"Sure I have." Nathan raised an eyebrow and watched her smile nervously. "I have...I had toast and tea."

"Let me guess, half a toast and a few sips of tea?" He didn't wait for her to answer. "I know you, pumpkin. You never eat when you're nervous. Come on, we are going to the kitchen to get you something to eat."