Camera || m.g ✓

T W E N T Y

edited

Mum is awake, but she still looks lifeless and empty. It hurts to see her with so many tubes connected to her body. Her room is filled with white monitors and the familiar smell of strong anti-septic shoots up my nose. I spot one with lines that monitor her heartbeat. It's slow, unsteady and not in some kind of steady rhythm. How I'd hate to see the lines go flat.

Max has left me alone with mum in excuse for hot chocolate down at the food court because the weather outside is cold out and it is nice to warm up. I don't know why I agreed, but I did.

"I'm sorry this had to cancel your last show," mum apologises. I smile weakly and tell her that it's fine, that family comes first.

"But that means I get to go back to Finland," I tell her, looking out to the positive side and she grins, "maybe we'll take you with us, mum."

"You sure do, kiddo," she says and ruffles my hair.

"So, what did you do there?" mum asks, positioning herself so that she can sit up against the headboard.

"You know, concerts and dance and other things," I answer lamely. Mum gives me a side eye, "other things?"

I grin, "yep. Other things."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Ice cream, pizza, late ferry rides," I list, counting it on my fingers, "honestly mum, you should know. You've been watching my videos, haven't you?"

Mum pauses, "not while I'm unconscious, no." She laughs and I wonder how she stays a jolly old soul in the most negative of times.

"Anything happened with the boys?" mum wiggles her eyebrows suggestively, "or maybe one of them. Because you know, Sera, you can't have the both of them. That's selfish!"

I feel a slight blush creep up my face when I feel it getting warm, but I bury it in my hands covering it up as a face palm.

"Very funny, mum."

My mind flashes back to when Marcus and I were sitting on the balcony. That was kind of awkward to think of, I tell you.

Back to when Martinus hugs me in front of the hotel in Sweden, back to when Martinus sent me that message a day ago. Oh and don't get me started on the pizza party.

I put my finger on my chin to give the 'I'm-thinking' impression, "there is one though."

Mum hums in response.

"Martinus hasn't answered my question on what shampoo he uses." Mum laughs and I grin widely.

"Why am I so blessed with a really funny daughter?"

"I don't know, you tell me, mum!" Mum shakes her head in amusement.

We fall into silence, smiling. I think about the things that has happened in the past few days and figure, mum should know about the reason she was here. But then again, she was unconscious.

"Mum?"

"Yes, darling?"

I pause for a moment, hesitating, "why are you here?"

Mum doesn't answer straight away. She purses her lips, looking down to her hands. When she lifts her head back up, I see a glint of emotion in her eyes. But before I could figure out what it was, it was gone as fast as it came.

"I don't know, Sera," she answers, not meeting my eyes. Strange.

"But everything is going to be just fine," she assures me and I try to pull up a small smile for her.