The Anatomy of a Parody Heart

the point

The morning after the funeral, Enzo sits on the sofa, in the living room. 

He has come out of his bedroom because his mum has come out of her bedroom. He can hear her, in the kitchen. Talking to his father and Izzy. 

His father.

And Izzy.

He is surprised that he can't hear them shouting.

Enzo sits on the sofa, in the living room - with Dan's letter in his hand. He hasn't opened it yet. He hasn't even looked at it.

Dan's letter. 

Dan.

Once he has read it, that is it. No more Dan and Enzo. No more Dan.

The end.

The end.

Enzo unfolds it.

Dear Enzo,

By the time that you are reading this, the surgery will have worked, and you will be okay. The doctors told me that the cancer has not reached my heart: leukemia is a cancer of the blood, not of the heart, but I believe - and you may think me childish for this - but I believe, in some way, that you have kept all those other parts of me - my heart, in particular - cancer-free. That love can be the cure for anything, however big, however small - love is the point, Enzo. Love is everything.

If you are reading this now, then I want you to know that there is nothing that you could have done to stop this. This is what I wanted, Enzo. 

I wanted you.

But this isn't an excuse letter. This isn't an apology letter, either. 

This is a thank you. 

I'll start here. Thank you for my birthday present - Enzo, it was beautiful. 

Thank you for letting me take you to the children's ward, and letting me show you the stars. 

Thank you for sticking with me these last few weeks - and if I'm allowed one apology here, it is this - I'm sorry that it was only a month, and that it had to end, and in this way. I wanted so much longer with you, and I regret not having gone up to you earlier, when I had the chance. Our hearts make cowards of all of us, don't they?

You have been such an influence in my life. Thank you for being there, and for being you. 

Thank you for everything.

I love you, I love you, I love you,

Dan 

xxx

Ps. This isn't goodbye.

Enzo stares at it. Stares and stares and stares. 

His tears smudge Dan's handwriting. 

This isn't an excuse letter. This isn't an apology letter, either.

This is a thank you.

Oh, Dan...

This isn't goodbye.

This isn't the end.

Enzo smiles. Closes his eyes.

Puts his hand on his chest, over his heart.

Over Dan's heart.

The letter - his own letter - the one he wrote to Dan, all those hours and days and weeks ago - Dan's birthday present - floats back into his mind.

You wanna know something, Dan? Something crazy?

I think I'm falling in love with you, too.