We the fools

Converse and flashbacks

My converse squeaked on the linoleum floor of the empty hallway. I sighed. Fuck this. I should just bail. Climb out of a window or something. It's my usual style.

I was in detention. And I was in it good. Apparently it's against the rules to smoke in school grounds. Who would have thought? It's not like I was smoking weed or anything, it was just a cig. But that didn't stop Mr. Howle from having a piss at me, with red sweaty forehead and purple cross cross veins popping out. He lectured me and I had tuned out, until I heard....

"You know, Abbi, I've seen plenty of girls like you and you know what? they get off worse for wear. They either get knocked up, become homeless or die."

Well that was harsh, I thought

" And you want to know what else?"

Let me guess, your a virgin? no surprise there.

" your pathetic acts are because you, you like to make trouble, you like to screw things up for others because you can't have your happiness anymore."

I looked him in the eye

He doesn't know what kind if life I have. I do not screw things up for others. They are just there, at the wrong place at the wrong time. Too many times.

I squared my jaw but continued to look him in the eye

" And you"

I pointed at him

"Need to realize that I"

I pointed at myself

"Don't give a fuck"

I smirked and turned on my heel, dropping my burnt out cig on the floor and kicking under the lockers. I feel the principals eyes on my back as I keep walking not looking back.

"Saturday detention, Abbi. Be there"

I laugh and flip him one over my shoulder

"Whatever"

And I keept walking, pushing though the throngs of people, until I got outside. But only then had I let one single tear slip through. Just one. Because it has shocked me just how close to the truth that mr. Howle's words were.