Why'd You Leave Me?[ A Bensler FanFic]

Chapter 38

"Momma." Tucker whispered, and I barely opened my eyes. I looked at my little green eyed boy and he smiled.

"Tucker, what are you doing in here?" I whispered, and he reached out to me. I looked over at Lark, who was still sleeping, and I shook my head.

"Come on, Tucker." I spoke. I climbed out of bed slowly, and picked him up.

I carried him out and into the living room. I sat him down on the couch, and I went to check on Jade, who was sleeping soundly. I then went back out, and Tucker climbed onto my lap as soon as I sat down.

"So, why are you up, Tuck?" I asked, and he laid his head on my shoulder.

"I was thinking."

"Oh, what were you thinking about, little guy?" I asked, and he smiled.

"I want a brother." He spoke, and I laughed.

"You are just full of it." I smiled, and he giggled.

"Can we go back to Manhattan? I miss Aunt Sadie, Uncle Ty, and Aunt Hazel." He spoke, and I smiled.

"I think we can work that out. We need to show Jade off." I replied.

"What are you two doing?" Lark asked, as he came out of our bedroom.

"Tucker woke me up just because he wants a little brother." I spoke, and I watched my husband's expression change.

"Dude, Jade isn't even a month old yet."

"I know THAT, Daddy." Tucker giggled, and Lark picked up a pillow and threw it at us. He smiled and sat down next to me.

"I hate you two." He sighed, and I smiled and leaned over and kissed him.

"I think we need to plan on heading up to Manhattan for a weekend. I miss my family, and so does Tucker."

"Alright, I'll see if I can manage that. And good thing you are out of school for the summer." He replied, and I smiled.

It was nice being able to go back to school. I was 2 years closer to getting my degree, and I could practice law. Lark made sure that I could go back to school once we got back together, because he hated himself for allowing me to quit.

=~=

2 years earlier

I quickly opened the door that led into the kitchen at my parent's house. I shut it behind me.

"Mom!" I called, my voice shaky. I'm so anxious and excited.

"Harper? What are you doing here?" She asked.

At least she was home.

"I need to talk to you. Where are you?" I called back. She laughed slightly.

"My room!" She yelled. I quickly ran up the stairs and into my parent's room. My mother was sitting on the bed, going through a tote of clothes.

"Whoa, they really grew out of their clothes." I smiled, and she nodded.

"Does Tuck need more clothes? Ty has a lot here that he doesn't fit into anymore, and hasn't for years."

"Yeah, he would love some more." I chuckled, and she nodded.

"Alright, well, take what you want." She smiled. I picked up a pair of jeans, and looked at the size as my mother continued to go through it.

"Wait, what did you need to talk about?" She asked, and I smiled.

"Um, Lark and I talked."

"Lark is in town yet?"

"Yeah, and I think we might get back together." I spoke, and she slowly laid the shirt she had in her hands down.

"What?"

"Mom, I really missed him, and I still love him." I breathed, and she bit her lip.

"Harper, are you sure?" She spoke.

"Mom, he is so good with Tucker. And what he said was true."

"What did he say?" She asked.

"That he wasn't really ready to have a wife or a son. He needed to grow up."

"Are you kidding me, Harper?" She exclaimed, as she stood up. I bit my lip.

"Mom..." I trailed off.

"No! You aren't getting back together with him! He hurt you and Tucker!"

"But Mom!" I exclaimed, and then I stood up. 

I'm a grown woman. I'm 22 and a mother to an almost 3 year old. I can't just let my mother tell me what to do.

"I love him, Mom. I've never stopped loving him. You need to understand that if I make this choice, and it is a mistake, it is my fault. But I love him. It has been weird not sleeping in the same bed with him, or being able to hear his laugh."

"Harper, he hurt you!"

"I know he did!" I screamed, and she watched me as I started to pace, the skirt of my uniform swaying as I did.

"Okay, go." She spoke, and I took a slow breath.

"I don't want Tucker growing up like I did."

"What?"

"Mom!" I exclaimed, and she put her hand over her mouth and watched me with wide eyes.

"Okay, I don't want Tucker to grow up like I did. I don't want him to see me as his mother and father, because I can't be both. I can't teach him how to be a man, and I know that Dad and Dominick said they would help, but no one can truly teach him, unless they are Lark." I spoke and she nodded slowly, as she continued to watch me.

"They spent one night together, and Tucker already loves Lark so much. He fell asleep in his arms, and it was adorable. Mom, I want him to have that all the time. And I need him."

"You don't need anyone." My mother replied, and I bit my lip.

"I do. I'm not that strong. I need someone to support me. To love me. I want more children, and I can only see myself having children with Lark. Look at how adorable Tucker is." I breathed. My mother smiled when I talked about Tucker. He was a pretty damn adorable kid.

"Alright." She breathed.

"Alright?" I asked, and she nodded.

"Yeah, I'm not happy about it. But I'll try to be supportive."

"Thanks. Thanks so much." I smiled, as I walked over and hugged my mother. She caressed my hair, and kissed my forehead gently.

"I love you so much, Mom." I breathed.

"I'm sorry I left you when you were younger. I love you so much now, and since the day you were born." She breathed, and I hugged her tighter.

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