Sidemen Imagines

Closer than friends (Simon #9)

Hope you enjoy.

Sitting silently, just watching Simon at his desk until he'd finished would be painfully boring to most people but for me it made me think. It made me think about life and also why I did this to myself. Yes I am great friends with Simon but why didn't I just come back later when he was finished instead of creepily stalking him work? As this occurred to me I instantly took action. Crawling off the bed to leave, Simon frantically spun around and watched me until I met his eyes when I looked back to see if he'd noticed, which he had.

"Are you leaving?" he asked quite demanding but his speech was also laced with sorrow.

"Well I was going to and then come back when you're done", I said trying to mirror his tone by being quite forceful. He looked a little taken back.

"Well I'm very nearly done so you might as we just stay", he replied slightly quieter but still very dominant.

"You say that but almost done could still be another 30 minutes", I snap back at him, agitatedly.

"Well I've just got to let this download and then I'm finished. I promise", he replied instantly, obviously frustrated. He pointed at his screen and I saw a bar moving across, still loading.

"Alright, but if it takes too long I have your word of lie stored as proof", I said inching back over to my original position. He watched with eagle eyes until I sat back down and even when I'd sat down he still continued to stare just not as harshly, more emotionally. I felt he wanted something, something from me. Why else would he be staring? Then my mind replayed some of my buried memories of me and Simon.

One of the moments was when it had just been the two of us in the whole house; he'd chased me around everywhere, and when he finally caught me, he hugged me around my waist for a few seconds. Then when we'd pulled away he'd kissed me on my cheek but nothing more. That wasn't the last time though, we'd kissed again, but nothing serious ever came from it. It was always more of a spur of the moment.

Another memory came to me when we were out together and we walked hand in hand without realising because it was so free, effortless and maybe we just really liked the connection.

"(Y/N)... (Y/N)", I heard Simon almost shout dragging me from my thoughts and making me lock eyes with him.

"Sorry. I zoned out, did you say something?" I asked once I controlled my embarrassing red cheeks and pushed away my old photos.

"I asked if you were okay and I'm finished now", he replied surprisingly calm.

"Oh. I'm fine thanks I was just thinking about stuff."

"What kind of stuff?" he asked leaning his body forward now more interested.

"The past", I simply replied. His expression changed.

"Oh, okay. Well the future is what you should live for and you shouldn't dwell on the past", Simon followed up with, a little nervous I sensed to even ask about what.

"But what if the future is affected by my past and when I say past I mean this last year." I'd got him now. He was trying to connect things together; I could see the cogs turning but I didn't let him work it out. "You and me have been closer than ever this last year and if I'm not to recall the past than I can't move forward with you. Can I, unless you don't want to?" Did I really just spill that out?

A shock came across his face and lowered his mouth slightly. I watched him until I'd finished speaking and then messed around twisting my fingers in my lap. I wanted to look up but I also didn't want to, I still wasn't sure on the outcome I wanted, but it was too late now. I'd spoken and just had to wait patiently for a response.

"Do you want anything to happen (Y/N)?" Simon asked obviously still working things out for himself and absorbing my words. His eyes however seemed to have grown bigger and glowed a little brighter.

"I asked you first, Minter", I slightly teasingly responded with and a little laugh and smile followed after but soon vanished as quick as it they had appeared.

We sat in silence for a little while and stared at the one opposite us as we thought. The silence was a tiny bit unnerving yet calming. My mind was racing so fast that I couldn't decide so I was glad the atmosphere wasn't so thick.

Did I really have feelings for Simon or did I just really like our friendship? Do we have a desire beyond our friendship or do we just love ourselves as friends and no more?

I asked myself endless questions and I guess Simon did too as he looked deep in thought, probably the way I looked too. The silence was broken though when he sprang up from his chair making me look up and watch him. His chair spun around bodiless as he gently moved over to my side, sitting down next to me, but he might as well have been sat on me as he leant his body into mine.

He placed his hand onto my knee. I immediately felt tense and worried yet relaxed and safe. I looked up from my knee with strained eyes to his intense ones that seemed to long for something. Did he want me? Did I want him?

He put an arm lightly around my waist which only created chills. I felt his fingers move up and down about my waist ever so slightly, from worry or love I couldn't tell but I liked it, I think. I rotated my gaze, looking for the answer, but his fingers suddenly became still only making me spin back to his face where my eyes stopped upon his mouth. He was observing me closely but he still hadn't said anything. It only made me more nervous.

He somehow sensed this, maybe it was written on my face, but he leant his face closer to mine. So close that I could feel his breath against my lips until there was no breath left. Our lips were connected; it was slow, soft and gentle until he pulled away leaving me looking stupid still with my lips pouted out. I moved my lips back to normal and opened my eyes to find a small smirk upon Simon's face. He looked cute which only made my cheeks blush and smile awkwardly back. The kiss wasn't like any of our previous ones, this one had passion, and it wasn't meaningless.

"I think I've made my mind up", Simon said a little louder than a whisper.

"I think I have too Simon", I replied back at the same tone looking him directly in the eyes.

"Well I hope it's the same answer as mine", Simon happily said before he bent back down to my height, stopping inches from my face giving me the decision. I paused for a split second but then moved me lips onto his. I felt him smile into the kiss only making me mirror him and as I pulled away he gripped the back of my head pulling me into another kiss which I accepted; I looped my arms around his neck loosely before I disconnected my lips to breath.

"I think I love you (Y/N)", Simon said softly as he tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

"I think I love you too Si", I replied whilst smiling, he was already smiling.

Hopefully you enjoyed and I'm almost at 1K which is crazy. Thank you everyone, and have a good day/night.