Taking Risks

11

For @ninz0517 - thank you for still reading and thank you for giving me a great idea.

//

HER

I can't sleep.

I've been awake for quite some time now and I know I should be sleeping (since it's not a good idea for my body not to get the rest it needs) but I just. Cannot. Sleep.

AT ALL.

The sun is about to rise in probably a couple of hours but my head is full of different things at the moment and it just doesn't want to be quieted.

Wooshoo. Umamin ka. May certain surfer lang naman kasi diyan sa tabi-tabi na totally laman ng utak mo ngayon kaya di ka makatulog.

Shut up, self.

I groan as I turn on my stomach and cover my head with my pillow, trying to block out my thoughts. But to no avail, of course. I then try not squeal and giggle like an addict high on drugs as memories of how (ok fine, I admit it already! Jeez!) RJ and I were texting a while ago, surfaced to the forefront of my mind.

Though totoo naman kasi na high ka. Hindi nga lang sa droga. Kung hindi sa kanya.

Pota, sabing shut up ka na, self eh!

At the rate my brain was going - I should probably enter myself into a facility. Aside from having this blasted SCID - it seems like I'm starting to have... Well, what do you call this feeling of inexplicable giddiness every time a certain person pops up in your head?

Ahhh... Shit. YOKO NA.

Quickly sitting up, knowing that I won't be getting any shut-eye anytime soon, I stand and walk over to my walk-in closet where my little ocean is situated. Ninna and I thought it best to hide it here for the meantime, knowing that if my mother sees this - she will throw it away instantly, no questions asked. She'll be thinking that it's something that might be detrimental to my health. Even though Ninna assured me that this was completely sanitized before it even got in our door.

I sit cross-legged, Indian-style in front of it and before I know it - I'm smiling for no reason as I stare at it, my finger going to its glass with Nemo and Dory following the way my finger moves. I chuckle once I realize that I am already grinning - widely at that.

Shet. Malala ka na, Menggay.

I am happy though. Very much so. Just the thought of RJ and his good morning texts everyday have me smiling and giggling already like one crazy lady. Add to that his random texts throughout the day that goes on way into night time and my cheeks hurt from smiling too much once it's off to bed.

I remember yesterday just after I got ready for bed, he texted and asked how my day was. I replied and said it was alright. Nothing really special has happened to me yesterday except for the routine that has always been my everyday. I asked him how his day was in return and he told me about how he and Katring went for a quick swim in the community pool found in our village and how Riz, his youngest sister, asked him to help her with a school project. He also said how his mom became adamant that he start learning how to cook and I ended up laughing at that because I could hear him whining in my head as I read his long-ass text to me.

I was about to type a reply when he suddenly sent me a short video message. Frowning but pleasantly surprised - I looked through my window and saw him gazing back at me. He motioned towards my phone and I knew he wanted me to watch what he just sent. This was a first for him. He usually sends texts or fansigns taped on his window about things he wanted to say. Or sometimes even a link to his new YouTube vid that he wanted me to see. Or anything random really - like a photo of something he saw that day that he wanted me to see or a link to an article he wanted me to read.